Holidays— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and accurate: start with a clear topic sentence saying where you went, give one or two specific details (which countries or highlights), and avoid repetitions and filler. Use correct grammar (e.g. "the best holiday of my life", "I went to Europe"). Limit to 2–3 sentences and use linking words like "for example" or "such as" when giving specifics.

例: I went to Europe for my last holiday. I visited about five countries, including France and Italy, where I enjoyed local food and historic architecture, such as the Colosseum in Rome and the Louvre in Paris.

提案: Begin with a direct statement and then give clear reasons. Avoid hesitations and redundant phrases (e.g. "a person"). Use linking words like "because" and add one specific example of what you do on holidays. Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, I enjoy holidays because they give me a break from daily stress and routines. For example, I like short trips to scenic places where I can meet new people and see stunning landscapes.

提案: Answer directly: name the holiday and give 2 specific reasons why you like it. Remove filler sounds and use correct vocabulary ("celebrate New Year" rather than "ring in"). Use linking words like "because" and "for example."

例: My favourite public holiday is New Year’s Day because my family gets together and we watch fireworks. We also enjoy special meals and it feels like a fresh start for everyone.

提案: Start with a topic sentence stating main activities, then give one or two specific examples. Avoid unclear phrases like "go the picture"; use precise words such as "visit villages" or "go sightseeing." Keep sentences short and coherent with linking words like "for example."

例: On holidays I usually relax and spend time with my family. For example, we visit nearby villages and go sightseeing to enjoy the landscapes and take photos.

提案: Be clear and grammatical: say "I enjoy spending time alone at home." Give specific activities and avoid fillers. Use linking words like "for example" and limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, I enjoy spending time alone at home because it helps me relax and escape stress. For example, I work on personal projects, cook new recipes, and read books.

提案: State your preference clearly and give concise reasons and one example activity. Remove fillers and fix grammar ("fill me with energy"). Use linking words like "because" and "for example."

例: I prefer busy holidays because I am extroverted and enjoy social activities. For example, I like gathering with friends to play group games like Mafia and attend local events.

提案: Give a clear direct answer, then give specific examples of exciting activities. Use correct verbs and adjectives ("adrenaline-seeker", "thrilling activities"), and avoid vague or ungrammatical phrases like "climbing in dangerous situation." Keep to 2–3 sentences.

例: I prefer an exciting holiday because I’m an adrenaline-seeker. For example, I enjoy scuba diving and rock climbing, which give me a thrilling challenge and memorable experiences.

× My previous vacation was the best holiday of lifetime and I went to to Europe and I explored around 5 or 6 countries there and I enjoyed the new culture.

✓ My previous vacation was the best holiday of my life and I went to Europe, where I visited about five or six countries and enjoyed the new cultures.

Use singular/plural correctly: 'lifetime' is a noun but the idiom is 'of my life' (singular). 'to to' is a typographical error. 'Explore' in past context should be 'visited' or 'explored' with an object; 'around 5 or 6' is better as 'about five or six'. 'Culture' should be plural 'cultures' because multiple countries have different cultures. Also punctuation improved for clarity.

× Yes, I like holiday, especially short breaks from daily stress and daily routines because I am an extrovert, a person and I like to explore and go and see stunning landscapes and.

✓ Yes, I like holidays, especially short breaks from daily stress and daily routines because I am an extrovert and I like to explore and see stunning landscapes.

Use plural 'holidays' or the article 'a holiday'. 'a person' is unnecessary and awkward; remove it. Trailing 'and' was incomplete. Compact phrasing 'explore and see' is sufficient. Remove redundant words for grammatical correctness and fluency.

× Actually, I ring in the new year and I think the best public holiday is the days, uh, uh, that, uh, we are off, uh, for starting the new year.

✓ Actually, I celebrate the New Year and I think the best public holiday is the days when we are off to start the new year.

Use correct verb: 'ring in the new year' is idiomatic but 'celebrate the New Year' is clearer. 'the days, uh, uh, that, uh, we are off' should be 'the days when we are off'. Capitalize 'New Year' as it is a holiday name. 'for starting' is changed to 'to start' to express purpose. Removed fillers.

× And the day of the new year, uh, is special because we are, uh, we have family gathers and we watch, uh, the fireworks together.

✓ And New Year's Day is special because we have family gatherings and we watch the fireworks together.

Use correct noun form: 'family gathers' is incorrect; use 'family gatherings'. 'the day of the new year' is better as 'New Year's Day'. Remove repeated subject 'we are, uh, we have'. Streamline sentence for grammatical correctness.

× On holidays I prefer to gather with my family and relax and go the picture. Go to the pictures of village or some places that has sightseeing and stunning landscapes to enjoy.

✓ On holidays I prefer to gather with my family, relax, and visit the countryside or places that have sightseeing and stunning landscapes to enjoy.

'go the picture' and 'Go to the pictures' are ungrammatical; likely intended 'visit the countryside' or 'visit picturesque villages'. Use parallel structure with verbs: 'gather, relax, and visit'. 'places that has' should be 'places that have' to agree with plural subject.

× Yes, I enjoy spending time alonely at home, uh, and being away, uh, from daily routine and daily stress.

✓ Yes, I enjoy spending time alone at home and being away from my daily routine and daily stress.

Use correct adverb/adjective: 'alonely' is incorrect; 'alone' is appropriate. Add possessive 'my' before 'daily routine' for natural English. Remove fillers and commas.

× Uh, For example, I try to umm, catch on my personal, uh, projects and relax or cooking and reading, uh, fill me uh.

✓ For example, I try to work on my personal projects and relax; cooking and reading fill me with joy.

'catch on my personal projects' is incorrect; 'work on' or 'catch up on' are correct. Parallel forms required: 'relax; cooking and reading fill me' uses verbs correctly. 'fill me uh' is incomplete; specify what they fill you with (e.g., 'fill me with joy'). Removed fillers.

× Actually, I like, uh, busy holidays because I am an extrovert, uh, person and I enjoy uh, being with other people and playing mafia with our friends.

✓ Actually, I like busy holidays because I am an extrovert and I enjoy being with other people and playing Mafia with my friends.

Remove redundant 'person'. Capitalize 'Mafia' if referring to the game title. 'our friends' changed to 'my friends' for speaker perspective. Simplify fillers.

× Uh, so I think gathering with other peoples can, uh, can uh, fill me, uh, alive.

✓ So I think gathering with other people can make me feel alive.

'peoples' is incorrect here; use 'people' (plural noncount). 'fill me alive' is nonstandard; use 'make me feel alive'. Remove repeated 'can' and fillers.

× Well, I'm an adrenaline rush person and I prefer to have a, uh, have an exciting holiday, uh, and do, uh, some, uh, accelerating, uh, thing to do.

✓ Well, I'm someone who enjoys an adrenaline rush and I prefer to have an exciting holiday and do some thrilling activities.

'adrenaline rush person' is awkward; rephrase as 'someone who enjoys an adrenaline rush'. 'accelerating thing to do' is incorrect; use 'thrilling activities' or 'adventurous activities'. Ensure noun forms are correct and avoid unnecessary fillers.

× For example, I like go diving and climbing in dangerous situation.

✓ For example, I like to go diving and climbing in dangerous situations.

Need infinitive 'to go diving'. Use plural 'situations' or specify 'in dangerous situations' and include article if singular ('in a dangerous situation'). Also 'climbing in dangerous situation' should parallel 'diving' structure. Adjust preposition and number for correctness.