Advertisement— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答有主题句但表达不够清晰、语法和词汇使用有误且信息零散。建议：1) 用一句清晰的主题句直接回答问题；2) 用1–2个简洁的支持句具体描述广告内容和为什么印象深刻；3) 使用恰当的词汇和连词（e.g. because, so, for example）并注意语法（时态和名词、动词形式）。

例: A TV commercial for a smartphone impressed me when I was a child because it showed how the device helped a young woman stay connected with her family across different countries. For example, the ad used emotional music and realistic scenes of video calls and packing luggage to show how she kept in touch despite living far away.

提案: 答案直接且相关，但表达有词汇和搭配错误，需更准确和连贯地描述。建议：1) 用更自然的搭配（e.g. on buses, in subway stations, on trains）；2) 使用连接词（for example, because）把一般陈述和原因连起来；3) 纠正单复数和介词用法。

例: Yes, I see a lot of advertising on buses, trains and in subway stations because transport is a good place to reach many people. For example, I often notice ads on digital screens and posters inside vehicles and on station walls.

提案: 回答简短但有语法和拼写错误，缺乏细节支持。建议：1) 写出主题句并用两句支持理由；2) 纠正拼写和语法（e.g. advertisements, they can be）；3) 提供具体例子说明何时觉得烦人。

例: Not really. I find most advertisements annoying because they appear too often and interrupt videos. For example, I get frustrated when a long video has repeated pop-up ads that break the flow.

提案: 回答明确且有观点，但表达略显重复和一般化，需更具体和自然。建议：1) 用更自然的表达说明偏好并解释原因；2) 提供具体例子或说明广告如何影响你；3) 注意名词复数和连贯词使用。

例: I prefer advertisements about animal protection because they raise awareness of animal welfare and our responsibility to the planet. For example, a campaign showing injured wildlife and how donations help rescue centres really moved me and made me more likely to support the cause.

提案: 答案相关但存在词汇错误和语法问题，细节不够准确。建议：1) 用正确词汇（e.g. I often encounter ads, news websites, scrolling through apps）；2) 解释广告形式和举例说明定向广告如何出现；3) 使用连接词使句子更流畅。

例: Yes, I often encounter ads on my phone and computer, especially on social media and news websites. For instance, while scrolling through apps I frequently see targeted adverts that are based on my browsing history and previous searches.

× It showed how the phone held a young woman keep in touch with family, clothes, different countries and the emotion, music and real looking things.

✓ It showed how the phone helped a young woman keep in touch with her family, see clothes in different countries, and share emotions, music, and realistic images.

原句结构混乱，动词短语和并列成分不一致，且缺少介词和代词。应使用“helped ... keep in touch”表示帮助某人保持联系，并为并列项使用平行结构（see clothes, share emotions）。另外将“real looking things”改为“realistic images”更自然。建议在并列时保持动词形式一致，补全缺失的代词和介词。

× Yes, I see a lot of advertising on publishing spotlight buses, subways and trains.

✓ Yes, I see a lot of advertising on buses, subways, and trains.

原句中“on publishing spotlight buses”不自然且冗余。应直接使用介词“on”加交通工具名词复数。去掉多余词使表达清晰。

× The advertisements are often shown on the screen or posts on the world inside the vehicle, so it's common way to reach many people.

✓ Advertisements are often shown on screens or posters inside the vehicle, so it's a common way to reach many people.

原句词序和用词不当（“posts on the world inside the vehicle”无意义）。应使用复数名词“screens or posters”，并补全冠词“a common way”。保持句子简洁通顺。

× Not really, I don't like most advertisement because they appear too often.

✓ Not really, I don't like most advertisements because they appear too often.

“most advertisement”中名词单复数不一致，应使用复数“advertisements”。“most”用于可数复数名词或不可数名词。注意名词和限定词一致。

× AM can be annoying especially when I'm watching video.

✓ They can be annoying, especially when I'm watching videos.

原句中“AM”可能是拼写错误且代词使用不当。代指广告应使用复数代词“they”。另外“video”在此泛指视频时用复数或加不定冠词“a video”。建议确认首字母大写错误并使用正确代词与名词形式。

× I like those advertisements about protecting animals.

✓ I like advertisements about protecting animals.

“those”并非错误但在一般陈述中可省略；此处改为更自然的泛指表达“advertisements”。此条属于量词/指示词使用可改进。建议在泛指时省去指示词使表达更自然。

× This can raise people's awareness of protecting animal because the earth doesn't belong only to humans.

✓ These can raise people's awareness of protecting animals because the earth does not belong only to humans.

主语和指代不一致，前句提到“advertisements”（复数），因此应使用“These”。“animal”应为复数“animals”。此外将“doesn't”写成完整“does not”在书面中更正式。建议主谓和数保持一致。

× Yes, I frequently encountered water advertisement on my phone and computer, especially on social media and new website.

✓ Yes, I frequently encounter many advertisements on my phone and computer, especially on social media and news websites.

原句使用过去式“encountered”与频率副词“frequently”矛盾，应使用一般现在时“encounter”。“water advertisement”不合适，应为“many advertisements”或具体类型。“new website”应为“news websites”。还需将可数名词复数化。

× For instance, while scoring through apps, I often see targeted apps based on my browsing history.

✓ For instance, while scrolling through apps, I often see targeted ads based on my browsing history.

“scoring through”是拼写错误，应为“scrolling through”。此外“targeted apps”应为“targeted ads”更符合语境。注意动名词/现在分词拼写及词汇搭配。