Art— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear but contains some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as "I use avoid doing it." Try to use simpler, correct expressions and avoid redundancy. Also, keep your answer concise and natural.

例: Actually, I don't enjoy drawing very much because I get frustrated when I can't create what I imagine. Also, I don't have much talent or passion for it, so I usually avoid doing it.

提案: Your answer has some unclear phrases and grammatical mistakes, such as "taste different artists to style and brought." Try to use clearer vocabulary and correct sentence structures. Also, avoid filler words like "you know" and be more specific about your experiences.

例: Yes, I enjoy going to art galleries sometimes with my parents or friends. It's a great way to appreciate different artists' styles and learn more about art.

提案: Your answer is difficult to understand due to unclear and incorrect phrases like "a severe else or essential tutor" and "if I have a poor opportunity." Try to express your ideas clearly and logically using simple sentences and correct vocabulary.

例: Yes, definitely. I believe art is important because it helps us express our emotions and understand life better. If I had the chance to learn more about art, I think it would help me improve myself a lot.

提案: Your answer has grammatical errors and unclear expressions like "re relieve my suggest on my study." Try to use correct tenses and clearer phrases to explain your experience. Keep your answer concise and relevant.

例: Yes, I learned drawing when I was a kid. During senior high school, my parents encouraged me to draw to relieve stress from studying and to develop my hobbies.

× Actually I don't like drawing very much because I found it quite frustrating when I can't create what I imagine.

✓ Actually I don't like drawing very much because I find it quite frustrating when I can't create what I imagine.

The sentence mixes past tense 'found' with present tense context. Since the dislike is current, 'find' in present tense is appropriate.

× Besides, I don't think I have much talent or passion for it, so I use avoid doing it.

✓ Besides, I don't think I have much talent or passion for it, so I avoid doing it.

The phrase 'use avoid' is incorrect; 'use' should be removed to correctly express the idea.

× Well, definitely, you know, sometimes I often go to the exhibitions which shows a numerous arts with my parents or my friends.

✓ Well, definitely, you know, sometimes I often go to exhibitions which show numerous artworks with my parents or my friends.

'The exhibitions' should be 'exhibitions' without 'the' for general meaning; 'shows' should be 'show' to agree with plural 'exhibitions'; 'a numerous arts' is incorrect, should be 'numerous artworks'.

× It's a good way to taste different artists to style and brought.

✓ It's a good way to appreciate different artists' styles and works.

'Taste' is incorrect verb here; 'artists to style and brought' is unclear and grammatically incorrect; corrected to 'appreciate different artists' styles and works' for clarity and correctness.

× Yes, definitely. I think firstly a severe else or essential tutor, impress ourselves or impress our emotions on our life.

✓ Yes, definitely. I think firstly a serious or essential teacher can help us express ourselves or our emotions in life.

Original sentence is unclear and ungrammatical; 'severe else' is incorrect, replaced with 'serious'; 'tutor' changed to 'teacher' for clarity; sentence restructured for meaning.

× Secondly, I think if I have a poor opportunity to learn about that as I will improve myself a lot.

✓ Secondly, I think if I have a good opportunity to learn about that, I will improve myself a lot.

'Poor opportunity' is incorrect in this context; 'good opportunity' is appropriate; missing comma added for clarity.

× Oh well, I have learned drawing when I was a kid.

✓ Oh well, I learned drawing when I was a kid.

Present perfect 'have learned' is not appropriate with specific past time 'when I was a kid'; simple past 'learned' is correct.

× It happens when during my Senior High School my parents urged me to do some drawing to re relieve my suggest on my study and develop my hobbies of that.

✓ It happened during my senior high school when my parents urged me to do some drawing to relieve my stress from studying and develop my hobby.

Sentence is ungrammatical and unclear; 're relieve my suggest' is incorrect, corrected to 'relieve my stress'; 'hobbies of that' changed to 'my hobby'; verb tense corrected to past.