Art— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Старайтесь говорить более связно и избегать повторений и пауз. Используйте простые и понятные предложения, чтобы ответ был естественным и эффективным. Например, начните с прямого ответа, затем добавьте детали, используя связующие слова.

例: Yes, I enjoy drawing, especially portraits of people I like. I find capturing their expressions very interesting. However, I have never attended any formal drawing classes.

提案: Старайтесь строить предложения грамматически правильно и использовать связующие слова для логичности. Также избегайте излишней информации, если она не относится к вопросу напрямую.

例: Yes, I like visiting galleries. The last time I went to one was in Baku, the capital of Azerbaijan. I visited the National Museum, which has a beautiful art gallery inside.

提案: Избегайте частых пауз и слов-паразитов. Используйте связующие слова, чтобы сделать ответ более плавным и логичным. Также старайтесь использовать разнообразную лексику, чтобы выразить свои мысли более точно.

例: Yes, I want to learn more about art, especially performing arts. I have recently taken acting classes and really enjoyed the experience. Therefore, I am eager to explore this art form further because it has a strong influence on me.

提案: Старайтесь строить предложения более грамматически правильно и избегать незавершённых мыслей. Используйте связующие слова для логичности и полноты ответа.

例: No, I didn't learn drawing when I was a kid. However, my sister took formal drawing classes, and seeing her inspired me to learn more about drawing.

× Yes, I, you enjoy drawing, uh, I really get a kick of, uh, drawing portraits, portraits of people I like, uh, during their expressions, uh, they are periods too. But also I had never visited drawing classes and uh.

✓ Yes, I enjoy drawing, uh, I really get a kick out of, uh, drawing portraits, portraits of people I like, uh, during their expressions, uh, they are periods too. But also I have never visited drawing classes and uh.

The original sentence incorrectly uses 'I, you' which is confusing and incorrect. The pronoun should be consistent and appropriate to the speaker, so 'I enjoy drawing' is correct. Also, the phrase 'get a kick of' should be 'get a kick out of' to be idiomatic. Additionally, 'had never visited' should be 'have never visited' to correctly express the present perfect tense indicating experience up to now.

× Yes, I do like visit the gallery. The last ones when was when I visited Baku, it's a capital city of the Azerbaijan and it was the like National Museum and inside of the National Museum there was a art gallery and there was really beautiful for me and.

✓ Yes, I do like to visit the gallery. The last time was when I visited Baku, the capital city of Azerbaijan, and it was the National Museum. Inside the National Museum, there was an art gallery and it was really beautiful to me.

The sentence has several issues: 'do like visit' should be 'do like to visit' for correct verb form. 'The last ones when was when' is incorrect; it should be 'The last time was when'. 'It's a capital city of the Azerbaijan' should be 'the capital city of Azerbaijan' (no article before country name). 'It was the like National Museum' is incorrect; 'the National Museum' is correct. 'There was a art gallery' should be 'there was an art gallery' because 'art' starts with a vowel sound. 'There was really beautiful for me' should be 'it was really beautiful to me' for correct subject and preposition usage.

× Yes, I want to learn more about art, especially uh, performing art because I, I've been, uh, attempting acting classes and I really enjoyed this experience. Umm, I really wanted to know more about this, uh, art type because, uh, it's really, it has really big influence for me.

✓ Yes, I want to learn more about art, especially performing art because I have been attending acting classes and I really enjoyed this experience. I really want to know more about this type of art because it has a really big influence on me.

The phrase 'I've been attempting acting classes' is awkward; 'have been attending' is more appropriate for ongoing action. 'I really wanted to know' should be 'I really want to know' to maintain present tense consistency with 'I want to learn'. 'It has really big influence for me' should be 'it has a really big influence on me' to use correct article and preposition.

× No, actually I didn't learn drawing, but umm, my sisters learned and she attempted some, uh, formal drawing classes and I saw it in I wanted to learn and find out more, uh, information about the.

✓ No, actually I didn't learn drawing, but my sister learned and she attended some formal drawing classes. I saw it and I wanted to learn and find out more information about it.

'My sisters learned and she attempted' is confusing; 'my sister learned and she attended' is clearer and grammatically correct. 'Attempted' is not the best verb here; 'attended' is more appropriate for classes. The phrase 'I saw it in I wanted to learn' is incomplete and unclear; it should be 'I saw it and I wanted to learn'. The sentence ends abruptly; 'more information about it' completes the thought.