Art— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer has some grammatical errors and unclear phrases, such as 'I love drink' which should be 'I love drawing'. Try to use clear and correct sentences. Also, avoid redundancy and keep your answer concise within 5 sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: Yes, I love drawing, especially painting, and sometimes I sell my artworks with my friends. I enjoy drawing cultural themes and fictional characters. Recently, I published some of my drawings online and received amazing responses.

提案: Your answer is generally relevant but could be improved by using more precise vocabulary and clearer sentence structures. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas logically. Try to avoid vague phrases like 'most of the gallery contains' and be more specific.

例: Yes, I enjoy visiting galleries because they showcase traditional and visual arts, which I find fascinating. For instance, I recently visited a gallery in Basantapur that displayed artworks from the prehistoric era and the Rana period, which was very impressive.

提案: Your answer is short and lacks clarity. Try to provide more specific supporting details and use correct expressions. For example, instead of 'I will see every opportunity to get regarding it', say 'I always look for opportunities to learn more about art'.

例: Yes, absolutely. I am very enthusiastic about art and always look for opportunities to learn more. I enjoy working on different art projects to improve my skills.

提案: Your answer has some unclear and awkward phrases, such as 'Since when was one of the compulsory subjects?'. Try to use clear and grammatically correct sentences. Also, avoid repeating similar ideas and provide specific examples.

例: Yes, I used to draw a lot when I was a kid because it was one of the compulsory subjects at school. I enjoyed drawing fictional characters and people. Some of my drawings were even published in our school's cover letter.

× Yes, I love drink especially to paint as well as to sell with my friends.

✓ Yes, I love drawing, especially painting as well as selling with my friends.

The verb 'love' should be followed by the gerund form '-ing' when expressing likes or hobbies. 'Drink' should be 'drawing', and 'to paint' and 'to sell' should be in gerund form 'painting' and 'selling' to maintain parallel structure.

× I used to draw some of the arts and some of the culture and also I love to draw a fictional characters.

✓ I used to draw some art and some culture, and also I love to draw fictional characters.

'Arts' and 'culture' are uncountable or collective nouns here, so 'some art' and 'some culture' are correct. 'A fictional characters' is incorrect because 'characters' is plural; the article 'a' should be removed.

× Some of the drawing I have also published it online and I have got some amazing response.

✓ Some of the drawings I have also published online, and I have received some amazing responses.

'Drawing' should be plural 'drawings' to match 'some of the'. The pronoun 'it' is unnecessary and should be removed. 'Got' is informal; 'received' is more appropriate. 'Response' should be plural 'responses' to match 'some'.

× Yes, I enjoy going to the gallery as most of the gallery contains traditional arts, visual arts and I enjoy them a lot.

✓ Yes, I enjoy going to galleries as most galleries contain traditional arts and visual arts, and I enjoy them a lot.

'Gallery' should be plural 'galleries' to match 'most of the'. The verb 'contains' should be 'contain' to agree with plural subject 'galleries'.

× For example, I just went to the visual arts to see which was located at Basantapur which contains all the art regarding the prehistorical age and during our Rana.

✓ For example, I just went to the Visual Arts Museum located at Basantapur, which contains all the art from the prehistoric age and the Rana period.

The phrase 'visual arts' is unclear; specifying 'Visual Arts Museum' clarifies meaning. 'Prehistorical' should be 'prehistoric'. 'During our Rana' is incomplete; 'the Rana period' is correct. 'Contains' is correct as it refers to the singular museum.

× Since I'm very enthusiastic regarding that, I will see every opportunity to get regarding it.

✓ Since I'm very enthusiastic about that, I will take every opportunity to learn more about it.

'Will see every opportunity to get regarding it' is awkward. 'Will take every opportunity to learn more about it' is clearer and grammatically correct. 'Regarding' should be replaced with 'about'.

× So I love to work on the art.

✓ So I love working on art.

'Love' is usually followed by the gerund form. 'Work on the art' is awkward; 'work on art' is more natural.

× Since when was one of the compulsory subjects?

✓ Since when was it one of the compulsory subjects?

The sentence is missing the pronoun 'it' to refer to the subject. Adding 'it' makes the sentence grammatically correct.

× I tend to draw some of the fictional characters as well as I used to draw some people and character.

✓ I tend to draw some fictional characters as well as some people and characters.

'Character' should be plural 'characters' to match 'some'. Also, 'some of the fictional characters' can be simplified to 'some fictional characters'.

× I also published them in the cover letter that we normally published in our school.

✓ I also published them in the cover letter that we normally published at our school.

The preposition 'in' is correct here, but 'at our school' is more appropriate than 'in our school' when referring to location. The sentence is otherwise correct.