Birthday— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to avoid filler words like 'umm' and unclear phrases such as 'cut the cage'. Use clear and natural expressions, and keep your answer concise and coherent by using linking words to connect ideas.

例: On my birthday, I usually have a party at home with my family. We cook and eat food together, then we sing the birthday song and cut the cake. It's always a fun and joyful time.

提案: Pay attention to grammar, such as subject-verb agreement ('I were' should be 'I was'). Avoid repetition like 'enjoy and enjoy it'. Use linking words to make your answer more coherent and provide specific details.

例: When I was young, I always celebrated my birthday with my family. We enjoyed eating delicious food together, and everyone had a lot of fun.

提案: Try to use more natural expressions such as 'the day I was born' instead of 'my first day that seeing the world'. Also, avoid repeating 'important for me' twice. Provide a clear reason and link your ideas smoothly.

例: Yes, I think celebrating my birthday is important because it marks the day I was born. It gives me a chance to reflect on my life and spend time with loved ones.

提案: Avoid filler words like 'umm' and incorrect facts; China does not have a king. Instead, mention culturally relevant figures or festivals. Use clear and accurate information with appropriate linking words.

例: I think the most important birthday to celebrate in China is the Chinese New Year, which is a major festival that marks the beginning of the lunar calendar. It is celebrated by many people across the country with various traditions.

× On my birthday I usually have a party with my family at home and my family always cook food and eat together and umm, cut the cage. Sing a birthday song together and it's fun.

✓ On my birthday I usually have a party with my family at home and my family always cooks food and eats together and umm, cut the cake. Sing a birthday song together and it's fun.

The subject 'my family' is singular, so the verbs 'cook' and 'eat' should be in the third person singular form 'cooks' and 'eats'. Also, 'cut the cage' is a typo and should be 'cut the cake'.

× On my birthday when I were young, I always celebrated with my family. We enjoy and enjoy it and eating food together and we all have fun.

✓ On my birthday when I was young, I always celebrated with my family. We enjoyed it and ate food together and we all had fun.

The subject 'I' takes the past tense verb 'was' instead of 'were'. Also, the verbs 'enjoy' and 'eating' should be in past tense to match the past time frame: 'enjoyed' and 'ate'. 'Have fun' should be 'had fun' to maintain past tense consistency.

× Yeah, I think it's important for me to celebrate my birthday because it's my first day that seeing the world, so it's important for me.

✓ Yeah, I think it's important for me to celebrate my birthday because it's the day I was born, so it's important for me.

The phrase 'my first day that seeing the world' is incorrect. It should be replaced with a clearer expression such as 'the day I was born'. This corrects the prepositional and structural error.

× Umm, I think the most important to celebrate in China is the king, because the king is the most popular and important person in the world, so I think he is the most important celebrate in China.

✓ Umm, I think the most important birthday to celebrate in China is the king's, because the king is the most popular and important person in the country, so I think he is the most important to celebrate in China.

The phrase 'the most important to celebrate' is incomplete; it should specify 'birthday'. Also, 'celebrate' should be used as an infinitive 'to celebrate'. 'In the world' is too broad; 'in the country' is more appropriate. The possessive form 'king's' is needed to indicate the birthday belonging to the king.