Internet— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to give a direct response with a clear topic sentence, avoid redundancy, and use correct grammar. Also, use linking words to connect ideas logically.

例: I started using the internet when I was in junior high school. At that time, I took a technology class that introduced us to the internet, which was a fascinating experience for me because it was my first time using such technology.

提案: Your answer is understandable but has some grammatical mistakes and redundancy. Try to respond directly, use proper tense, and include linking words to make your answer coherent.

例: I go online every day because I work as a programmer in a technology company. Therefore, using online technology skills is essential for my job.

提案: Your answer is somewhat confusing and contains many hesitations and unclear phrases. Try to give a clear and concise response with proper sentence structure and linking words to explain your reason.

例: Yes, I remember that I avoid using the internet in the morning because it is a quiet time that helps me focus on studying without distractions.

提案: Your answer is good but can be improved by reducing redundancy and improving sentence flow. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid repeating words unnecessarily.

例: No, I don't spend too much time online now. However, I used to spend a lot of time on Instagram and other social media apps, which I realized was unproductive. Therefore, I changed my habits by setting a timer to limit my smartphone use to about one hour daily.

提案: Your answer conveys the idea but has grammatical errors and unclear phrases. Try to express your ideas clearly and use linking words to explain your reasons logically.

例: Without the internet, I would like to read books because the internet often distracts me with various content on my smartphone. Reading books helps me focus better on the material.

× I started using Internet when I was, uh, junior high school students at a time I took class of technology intelligence, which provides us opportunity to use Internet and the class of inter technology class, which is really stunning for me because I it was the first time to use technology.

✓ I started using the Internet when I was, uh, a junior high school student at a time I took a class of technology intelligence, which provided us the opportunity to use the Internet and the class of inter technology class, which was really stunning for me because it was the first time I used technology.

The sentence incorrectly uses plural 'students' instead of singular 'student' to match the singular subject 'I'. Also, 'class' should be singular with an article 'a'. 'Provides' should be past tense 'provided' to match the past context. 'Opportunity' needs the article 'the'. 'Internet' requires the definite article 'the'. The phrase 'I it was' is incorrect and should be 'it was'. The verb tense should be consistent in past tense.

× I started using Internet when I was, uh, junior high school students at a time I took class of technology intelligence, which provides us opportunity to use Internet and the class of inter technology class, which is really stunning for me because I it was the first time to use technology.

✓ I started using the Internet when I was, uh, a junior high school student at a time I took a class of technology intelligence, which provided us the opportunity to use the Internet and the class of inter technology class, which was really stunning for me because it was the first time I used technology.

The word 'Internet' requires the definite article 'the' because it is a specific noun. Similarly, 'class' needs the indefinite article 'a' when mentioned for the first time. Missing articles cause the sentence to sound unnatural and grammatically incorrect.

× I started using Internet when I was, uh, junior high school students at a time I took class of technology intelligence, which provides us opportunity to use Internet and the class of inter technology class, which is really stunning for me because I it was the first time to use technology.

✓ I started using the Internet when I was, uh, a junior high school student at a time I took a class of technology intelligence, which provided us the opportunity to use the Internet and the class of inter technology class, which was really stunning for me because it was the first time I used technology.

The sentence describes past events, so verbs like 'provides' should be in past tense 'provided'. Also, 'was' and 'used' should be consistent in past tense to maintain temporal coherence.

× Uh, I think I use online for every day because I needed to use online for my work.

✓ Uh, I think I use the internet every day because I need to use the internet for my work.

'Online' is incorrectly used as a noun; the correct noun is 'the internet'. 'Every day' is two words when used as an adverbial phrase. 'Needed' should be 'need' to match the present tense context. Also, 'use online' is incorrect; it should be 'use the internet'.

× Uh, I think I use online for every day because I needed to use online for my work.

✓ Uh, I think I use the internet every day because I need to use the internet for my work.

The definite article 'the' is required before 'internet' because it is a specific noun. Omitting 'the' makes the sentence grammatically incorrect.

× I worked as a programmer in technology company, which which needs to, uh, the scale of using online technology skills.

✓ I work as a programmer in a technology company, which needs, uh, a high level of online technology skills.

The original sentence mixes past tense 'worked' with present tense context implied by 'needs'. If the job is current, 'work' is correct. Also, 'technology company' needs the article 'a'. The phrase 'the scale of using online technology skills' is awkward and unclear; 'a high level of online technology skills' is clearer.

× I worked as a programmer in technology company, which which needs to, uh, the scale of using online technology skills.

✓ I work as a programmer in a technology company, which needs, uh, a high level of online technology skills.

The noun phrase 'technology company' requires the indefinite article 'a' because it is singular and countable. Also, 'the scale' is incorrect here; 'a high level' is more appropriate.

× I worked as a programmer in technology company, which which needs to, uh, the scale of using online technology skills.

✓ I work as a programmer in a technology company, which needs, uh, a high level of online technology skills.

The sentence has a repeated word 'which which' which is an error. Also, the phrase 'needs to' is incomplete and unclear; it should be rephrased for clarity.

× I don't wanna use in the, this online technology in my in the morning.

✓ I don't want to use this online technology in the morning.

The preposition 'in' before 'the' is unnecessary and incorrect. The phrase 'use in the, this online technology' is awkward; it should be 'use this online technology'. Also, 'wanna' is informal and should be 'want to' in formal speech.

× I don't wanna, I don't really use in the morning time because the morning time is good for my studying.

✓ I don't want to; I don't really use it in the morning because the morning is good for my studying.

The pronoun 'it' is missing after 'use' to specify what is not used. Also, 'morning time' is redundant; 'morning' suffices. 'Wanna' should be 'want to' for formal correctness.

× Uh, it's really the quiet experience, a quiet environment Apprise, uh, allows me to stay focused on my studying.

✓ Uh, it's really a quiet experience; a quiet environment, I suppose, allows me to stay focused on my studying.

The phrase 'the quiet experience' should be 'a quiet experience' because it is a general statement. 'Apprise' is incorrect here; likely the intended word is 'I suppose' or 'I appreciate'. The sentence structure is awkward and needs punctuation for clarity.

× So I don't wanna use in the, this online technology in my in the morning.

✓ So I don't want to use this online technology in the morning.

The preposition 'in the' before 'this online technology' is incorrect and unnecessary. The pronoun usage is unclear; removing 'in the' clarifies the sentence.

× No, I don't, but I did. I used to spend my time so much on the Instagram or something in social media application, but I found it was really in vain.

✓ No, I don't, but I did. I used to spend a lot of time on Instagram or something in social media applications, but I found it was really in vain.

The phrase 'spend my time so much' is awkward; 'spend a lot of time' is more natural. 'The Instagram' is incorrect; 'Instagram' does not need 'the'. 'Social media application' should be plural 'applications' to match the context.

× I used to spend my time so much on the Instagram or something in social media application, but I found it was really in vain.

✓ I used to spend a lot of time on Instagram or something in social media applications, but I found it was really in vain.

'Instagram' is a proper noun and does not require the definite article 'the'. Also, 'social media application' should be plural 'applications' to refer to multiple apps.

× So I changed my habit to not to use the smartphone so much.

✓ So I changed my habit to not use the smartphone so much.

The phrase 'to not to use' is incorrect; it should be 'to not use' or 'not to use'. The double 'to' is redundant.

× So I set timer to use smartphone and I I usually use smartphone for one hour.

✓ So I set a timer to use my smartphone, and I usually use my smartphone for one hour.

'Timer' is a countable noun and requires the indefinite article 'a'. 'Smartphone' should be preceded by a possessive pronoun 'my' to specify ownership.

× So I set timer to use smartphone and I I usually use smartphone for one hour.

✓ So I set a timer to use my smartphone, and I usually use my smartphone for one hour.

The noun 'smartphone' needs a possessive pronoun 'my' to indicate whose smartphone is being referred to. Also, the repeated 'I' is a typographical error.

× I would like to read books without Internet because, uh, with Internet I I'm easy to be distracted by smartphone which is really which has really con contents to watch.

✓ I would like to read books without the Internet because, uh, with the Internet, I'm easily distracted by my smartphone, which has really interesting content to watch.

'Internet' requires the definite article 'the'. 'I'm easy to be distracted' is incorrect; it should be 'I'm easily distracted'. 'Smartphone' needs a possessive pronoun 'my'. 'Con contents' is a typo and should be 'interesting content' or similar.

× I would like to read books without Internet because, uh, with Internet I I'm easy to be distracted by smartphone which is really which has really con contents to watch.

✓ I would like to read books without the Internet because, uh, with the Internet, I'm easily distracted by my smartphone, which has really interesting content to watch.

The sentence lacks possessive pronouns before 'smartphone'. Also, the phrase 'which is really which has really con contents' is confusing and contains errors; it should be simplified and corrected.

× I would like to read books without Internet because, uh, with Internet I I'm easy to be distracted by smartphone which is really which has really con contents to watch.

✓ I would like to read books without the Internet because, uh, with the Internet, I'm easily distracted by my smartphone, which has really interesting content to watch.

The adverb 'easily' should be used instead of 'easy' to modify the verb 'distracted'. The phrase 'con contents' is a typo and should be corrected to 'interesting content' or similar.