Internet— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答中存在语法错误，如时态不一致（use 应为 used），句子结构不够清晰，且表达略显冗长。建议使用简单明了的句子，注意时态一致，并且避免重复表达。

例: I started using the Internet when I was in primary school. At that time, I used it to chat with my classmates and to search for information for our school projects.

提案: 回答中有重复词汇（it it it's），句子结构混乱，表达不够自然。建议简化句子，避免重复，使用连接词使表达更连贯。

例: I go online almost every day because it helps me relieve stress. I also use the Internet to find research materials and get recommendations from influencers.

提案: 句子表达不够清晰，语法错误较多（brought 应为 brought away 也不合适），逻辑不够连贯。建议使用更准确的表达，清楚说明原因和情况。

例: I remember a time when I wasn't allowed to use the Internet because I didn't have my own phone. I could only use my dad's computer, but he often took it with him, so I couldn't go online.

提案: 语法错误（I surfing 应为 I surf），表达不够自然，句子结构复杂且不连贯。建议简化句子，注意主谓一致，使用连接词使表达更流畅。

例: Yes, I surf the Internet frequently because there is a lot of updated information that interests me. However, I try to spend some time exercising to stay healthy.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和拼写错误（Apart Paul 应为 Apart from），句子结构不清晰，表达不自然。建议使用正确的短语，简洁明了地表达观点。

例: Apart from surfing the Internet, I often go shopping or exercise with my family, which is good for our physical health.

× I remember the first time I use the Internet, maybe it was when I was in primary school and we tried to have a conversation with my classmates and searching some research.

✓ I remember the first time I used the Internet, maybe it was when I was in primary school and we tried to have a conversation with my classmates and searched some research.

这里的动作发生在过去，应该使用过去时态。"use"应改为"used"，"searching"应改为过去式"searched"。

× we tried to have a conversation with my classmates and searching some research.

✓ we tried to have a conversation with my classmates and searched some research.

动词"search"后面不需要使用现在分词形式，且与前面的"tried"保持时态一致，应该用过去式"searched"。

× Nowadays most of my time is spent on surfing online because it it it's a good way for me to relieve my stress and search for the research material as well and then find some recommendations from influencers.

✓ Nowadays, most of my time is spent surfing online because it is a good way for me to relieve my stress, search for research material, and find some recommendations from influencers.

句子结构混乱，重复了"it it it's"，应简化为"it is"。"spent on surfing"改为"spent surfing"更自然。并且列举动作时用逗号分隔，保持句子流畅。

× I didn't have my own cell phones and I could only surf online with my dad's computer while he brought away, so I couldn't.

✓ I didn't have my own cell phone and I could only surf online with my dad's computer while he was away, so I couldn't.

"cell phones"应为单数"cell phone"，因为指的是自己的手机。"brought away"错误，应为"was away"表示他不在。

× while he brought away, so I couldn't.

✓ while he was away, so I couldn't.

"brought away"不是正确的过去时表达，应该用过去进行时"was away"表示他当时不在。

× Yes, I surfing on the Internet frequently because of their large amounts of updated information that attracted me a lot, while I still need to spare some time to exercise and to keep healthy.

✓ Yes, I surf on the Internet frequently because of the large amount of updated information that attracts me a lot, but I still need to spare some time to exercise and keep healthy.

"I surfing"缺少助动词，应改为"I surf"。"their large amounts"应改为"the large amount"，信息是不可数名词。"attracted"应为现在时"attracts"，因为是现在的情况。连接词"while"改为"but"更合适。

× Apart Paul, apart from the time I surf on the Internet, I often go shopping or doing exercises with my family members, which is good for our health physically.

✓ Apart from the time I spend surfing on the Internet, I often go shopping or do exercises with my family members, which is good for our physical health.

"Apart Paul"错误，应为"Apart from"。"doing exercises"应改为动词原形"do exercises"与前面的"go shopping"保持一致。"health physically"词序错误，应为"physical health"。