Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and organise your response with a clear topic sentence, one or two supporting details, and a brief reason. Use linking words (e.g., "however", "because"). Avoid repetition and long chains of ages; one clear timeline is enough. Also vary vocabulary (e.g., "used it frequently" instead of "use that bike as much").

例: Yes, I had a bike from age 12. However, I started using it more often around 14 and 15 to go to friends' houses and short errands because it was quicker than walking. Later I stopped riding it regularly because it became inconvenient for longer trips.

提案: Begin with a direct opinion, then give two clear reasons with linking words (e.g., "mainly because", "also"). Use precise vocabulary (e.g., "infrastructure" instead of "sections for bike riders") and correct small grammar issues (e.g., "even if there are"). Keep to two or three sentences maximum.

例: Not really — bikes are not very popular in my country, mainly because reliable public transport like the metro and trains is more convenient. Also, there is poor cycling infrastructure such as dedicated lanes, so even where lanes exist, few people choose to cycle.

× Yes, when I turned 12 years old I did have a bike, but I didn't use that bike as much as I did when I turned 14 or 15.

✓ Yes, when I turned 12 years old I had a bike, but I didn't use it as much as I did when I was 14 or 15.

Use simple past 'had' instead of emphatic 'did have' which is unnecessary here; also use 'was 14 or 15' to describe age in the past rather than repeating 'turned', and replace the noun phrase 'that bike' with the pronoun 'it' for naturalness. Suggestion: Use simple past forms for past states and refer to the bike with 'it' to avoid repetition.

× And then I stopped using the bike again since it seemed inconvenient.

✓ Then I stopped using the bike because it seemed inconvenient.

The word 'again' is redundant given context; 'since' is acceptable but 'because' is clearer when giving a reason. Keep past tense 'stopped' and 'seemed' consistent. Suggestion: Prefer 'because' for explicit reasons and avoid unnecessary words like 'again' unless needed.

× Not as much since in my country public transport such as metro or trains are quite more popular.

✓ Not as much, since in my country public transport such as the metro and trains is much more popular.

Use article 'the' with 'metro'; treat 'public transport' as a singular uncountable noun so pair with singular verb 'is' or rephrase to 'modes of public transport are' for plural. 'Quite more popular' is unidiomatic; use 'much more popular'. Suggestion: Use 'the metro and trains' or 'modes of public transport' and 'much more popular'.

× We also have rickshaws over here that are used comparatively to riding bikes.

✓ We also have rickshaws here that are used as an alternative to riding bikes.

'Over here' can be shortened to 'here'; 'used comparatively to' is incorrect. Use 'used as an alternative to' or 'used instead of' to compare modes of transport. Suggestion: Use common comparative phrases like 'instead of' or 'as an alternative to'.

× There are also not a lot of sections for bike riders and even if they there are not a lot of people use them.

✓ There are not many lanes for bicycle riders, and even where they exist, not many people use them.

'Sections' is vague; 'lanes' or 'paths' is more natural. Word order 'even if they there are' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'even where they exist'. Use 'not many' instead of 'not a lot of' for formality. Suggestion: Use clear nouns like 'lanes' and the phrase 'where they exist' to express the contrast.