Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is too short and gives no detail. Give a direct topic sentence and add one or two supporting details (where you rode it, who taught you, or why you liked it). Keep it natural and under five sentences. Use linking words like “and” or “so” to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I did. I had a small red bicycle that my parents bought me when I was seven, and I learned to ride it in our neighborhood park. I loved it because it made me feel independent, and I used to ride it to visit my friends after school.

提案: The response is unclear and contains many hesitations and errors. Start with a clear topic sentence stating your opinion, then give specific reasons and one brief example. Use linking words like “because,” “however,” or “for example” to make your points coherent. Avoid irrelevant names or phrases and keep sentences concise (maximum five).

例: I don’t think bicycles are very popular in my country because cities are very crowded and roads are busy. For example, many people prefer cars or motorbikes since they feel safer and faster. However, some cities are promoting cycling with new bike lanes, so popularity might increase in the future.

× Bikes are not popular by Gandhi for many reasons.

✓ Bikes are not popular in India for many reasons.

The original sentence has incorrect preposition use and an incorrect proper noun ('Gandhi') that makes the meaning unclear. Use the preposition 'in' with countries/places and the appropriate country name (likely 'India'). Also 'by Gandhi' suggests agency which doesn't fit here. Suggestion: replace 'by Gandhi' with 'in India' to clearly state location.

× Umm, the forgive government for within that due to the crowded and they want to have, uh, clear policy to con toward the the road and also to make.

✓ Umm, the government forbids them because of the crowded roads, and they want to have a clear policy to control traffic and improve the roads.

The original sentence is ungrammatical and contains multiple problems: wrong word choices ('forgive' instead of 'forbid' or 'forbids', 'for within that'), missing articles, incorrect verb forms, and unclear phrasing. This falls under sentence structure errors. Corrections: use 'the government forbids them' or 'the government restricts cycling' for clarity; 'because of the crowded roads' uses correct preposition and noun; 'they want to have a clear policy to control traffic and improve the roads' uses correct infinitive verbs and collocations. Suggest practicing forming clear subject-verb-object clauses and choosing correct verbs ('forbid', 'restrict', 'control', 'improve').