Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Use correct verb tense and give a brief additional detail. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then add one supporting detail (e.g., who gave it to you or how you used it). Keep it natural and concise.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My parents bought it for me on my seventh birthday, and I used to ride it to the park every weekend.

提案: Be more organized and avoid repetition. Start with a clear opinion, then give two specific reasons using linking words (for example, 'because' and 'so'). Use clearer vocabulary (e.g., 'congested' instead of 'crowdy') and one concrete example or statistic if possible. Limit to 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are cheap and help avoid traffic congestion. For example, many commuters cycle to work during rush hour to save time and money, so cycling is a common sight in cities.

× Yes, I have a bike when I was a kid.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a kid.

The sentence mixes present tense 'have' with past time reference 'when I was a kid'. Use the past simple 'had' to match the past time frame. Suggestion: use past tense verbs for actions or possessions that occurred in the past (e.g., 'I had', 'I lived').

× Yeah, the bikes are very popular in our country because a lot of people use the bike instead of vehicles because it is very beneficial for the traffic use and it gives a relief when we when we go to, when we go to the when we go to the crowdy.

✓ Yes, bikes are very popular in our country because many people use them instead of cars. They are good for traffic and make it easier to move around crowded places.

This sentence has multiple problems. 'The bikes are very popular' uses an unnecessary definite article; use 'bikes are' for general statements (article error). 'A lot of people use the bike' mixes singular 'the bike' with plural subject; use plural pronoun 'them' (singular/plural and pronoun use). Repetition and awkward phrasing ('it gives a relief', 'crowdy') are errors in word choice and adverb/adjective forms; use 'make it easier' and 'crowded places'. Also simplify and split into two sentences for clarity (sentence structure). Suggestions: remove unnecessary 'the', match plural nouns and pronouns, replace 'vehicles' with 'cars' if intended, use 'crowded' not 'crowdy', and avoid repetition by planning the sentence before speaking.