Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more accurate and complete. Start with a clear past-tense topic sentence, avoid repetition, finish your thought, and add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Also correct tense consistency and use precise adjectives to describe feelings or memories.

例: Yes, I did. I had a red bicycle with training wheels, and I used to ride it in the park near my house every weekend. My older sister taught me how to balance, so after a few weeks I started riding without the training wheels. I remember feeling proud and excited whenever I managed to cycle on my own.

提案: Make a direct, fluent statement and avoid hesitations and fragmented phrases. Use correct word forms and linking words to expand your answer with reasons and examples. Replace fillers like 'uh' and avoid repeating words. Use vocabulary like 'convenient', 'eco-friendly', and give a specific example of where people cycle.

例: Yes, I think bicycles are quite popular in my country because they are cheap and convenient. For example, many people cycle to work or to the market in nearby neighborhoods since bikes are faster than walking and cheaper than taking public transport. In addition, cycling is environmentally friendly and good exercise.

× Yes I did. I have a red bicycle with training wheels and I used to ride around the park near my house every weekend.

✓ Yes, I did. I had a red bicycle with training wheels and I used to ride it around the park near my house every weekend.

The student is describing past habits. 'I have' is present tense; it should be 'I had' to match past time. Also add the object 'it' after 'ride' for clarity when using 'ride' with a direct object. Suggestion: keep past tense consistently for past situations and include necessary objects (e.g., 'ride it').

× My sister, my older older sister told me to balance it and I remember feeling very.

✓ My sister, my older sister, told me to balance it and I remember feeling very nervous.

The phrase 'older older sister' is a repetition error; use a single 'older sister'. The sentence ends incomplete with 'feeling very' which requires an adjective or adverb (here 'nervous') to complete the meaning. Suggestion: avoid unnecessary repetition and complete the adjective phrase (e.g., 'feeling very nervous').

× Yes, uh, because it's very con Fe, it's a very convenient transport.

✓ Yes, because it's very convenient; it's a very convenient means of transport.

'con Fe' appears to be a mispronunciation/typo; replace with 'convenient'. 'a very convenient transport' is unnatural: use 'a convenient means of transport' or 'a convenient way to travel'. Suggestion: use standard collocations like 'means of transport' or 'way to get around'.

× Uh, you can, you can cycling it to some place.

✓ You can cycle it to some places.

After modal 'can' use the base verb form, not the -ing form. 'Cycle' is the correct base verb. Also 'to some place' is awkward; use 'to some places' or 'to certain places'. Suggestion: after modal verbs use the base form ('can cycle'), and choose appropriate plural or 'to' phrases ('to some places' or 'to certain places').