Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more grammatical, concise and add one or two specific details. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms and articles, and use a linking word to add a detail or memory. Keep to no more than five sentences.

例: Yes, I had a bicycle when I was a child. I rode it almost every afternoon after school, usually around the park near my house. Because it was lightweight and easy to handle, I learned to ride without training wheels within a week.

提案: Give a clear opinion first, avoid fillers, and support it with specific reasons or examples using linking words. Correct vague or unclear phrases and keep responses coherent and within five sentences.

例: I don't think bicycles are very popular in my country at the moment. One reason is that many children prefer staying indoors to play video games, so they spend less time outside. In addition, busy urban lifestyles and better public transport mean families often choose cars or buses instead of cycling.

× Yes, I used to have bike when I was a child.

✓ Yes, I used to have a bike when I was a child.

The noun 'bike' is a singular countable noun and requires an article. Use the indefinite article 'a' before singular countable nouns when speaking generally about one item. Suggestion: use 'a bike' or 'the bike' if referring to a specific bike.

× I like to ride bike if you say after school.

✓ I liked to ride my bike after school.

The original sentence has multiple issues: 'like to ride bike' needs an article before 'bike' and possession if referring to the student's bike; the context is past habitual action (when they were a child), so past tense 'liked' or 'used to like' is appropriate. Also 'if you say' is ungrammatical here; likely intended meaning is 'after school'. Suggestion: use 'I liked to ride my bike after school' or 'I used to ride my bike after school.'

× I don't think bikes are popular in my country now because a lot of children now, umm, I simply know it's going to work every day.

✓ I don't think bikes are popular in my country now because a lot of children nowadays just stay at home and play video games.

This sentence has several problems relevant to the allowed list: incorrect verb phrase 'I simply know it's going to work every day' is ungrammatical and does not express the intended idea. Also 'a lot of children now' is awkward; use 'a lot of children nowadays' or 'many children nowadays'. The verb 'stay' fits better than 'sit' for being at home. Suggestion: rephrase to 'a lot of children nowadays just stay at home and play video games.'

× They just, uh, sit home and play video games.

✓ They just stay at home and play video games.

The phrase 'sit home' is nonstandard in English; use 'stay at home' to indicate remaining at home. Also ensure the verb matches the habitual present meaning: 'stay' is appropriate. Suggestion: 'They just stay at home and play video games.'