Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more fluent and grammatically correct, combine ideas into 2–3 clear sentences, and add a brief specific detail (e.g., how you felt or an alternative you used). Use linking words to join sentences (e.g., “so,” “because,” “instead”).

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. I usually went to school by bus because my parents couldn’t afford one, so I learned to rely on public transport instead.

提案: Give a clearer topic sentence then support it with specific reasons and a linking word. Avoid using the word “normal” repeatedly; choose clearer vocabulary like “mainly” or “primarily.” Add an example or brief comparison to strengthen the answer.

例: Yes, bicycles are quite popular in my country because they are inexpensive and easy to maintain. For example, many students and workers prefer cycling for short trips rather than taking a taxi or bus.

× No, I didn't have a bike when I was a child. I usually. Go school by bus and my parents can't afford a bike.

✓ No, I didn't have a bike when I was a child. I usually went to school by bus, and my parents couldn't afford a bike.

Multiple issues: (1) Sentence fragment 'I usually.' is a sentence structure error—combine into a full sentence. (2) Tense consistency: the question asks about the past ('when you were a child'), so actions should be in the past tense: 'go' should be 'went' (Past tense issue, ID 5). (3) Modal/ability in past: 'can't afford' refers to past inability, so use 'couldn't afford' (Modal verb usage / Past tense). Suggestion: Keep all verbs in the past when describing past situations: use 'usually went' and 'couldn't afford'. Use a comma before 'and' to join clauses.

× Yes, bicycles are popular in my country. Normal because it is less expensive and normal people easily afford it.

✓ Yes, bicycles are popular in my country. This is because they are less expensive and ordinary people can easily afford them.

Problems: (1) 'Normal' is misused as an adjective where a connector and noun phrase are needed—sentence structure and word choice issue. Use 'This is because' to link the idea. (2) Pronoun agreement and number: 'it' refers to 'bicycles' (plural), so use 'they' or 'them' (Incorrect use of pronouns, ID 12). (3) 'Normal people' is unnatural; 'ordinary people' is more appropriate (Incorrect use of adjectives, ID 13). (4) Tense/modal consistency: ability in general present uses 'can' not 'easily afford it' with 'it'—change to 'can easily afford them'. Suggestion: Use clear connectors, match pronoun number to nouns, and choose appropriate adjectives.