Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Clarify and organize your response. Start with a clear topic sentence answering the question, then add one or two specific supporting details (age, who gave it, what you liked). Avoid unrelated or unclear phrases (e.g. “UMM”, “driving biscuits”) and keep answers concise (maximum 4–5 sentences). Use linking words such as “because” or “so” to show reasons. Pronounce and choose words carefully to avoid confusion.

例: Yes, I did. My father bought me a bicycle when I was five because he wanted me to learn balance and enjoy outdoor play. I remember riding it every weekend in the park, which made me more confident and active.

提案: Give a direct opinion first, then support it with clear, specific reasons and examples. Avoid repetition and unclear phrasing. Use linking words like “because”, “for example”, and “also” to connect ideas. Mention who uses bikes (children, commuters), reasons for popularity (cheap, healthy, practical), and one short example. Keep to 2–4 sentences.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are affordable and convenient for short trips. For example, many children ride bikes to school and adults use them for commuting in crowded neighborhoods.

× My father brought it to me when I was five.

✓ My father bought it for me when I was five.

The original uses 'brought it to me' which is acceptable but 'bought it for me' is more likely intended when referring to receiving a gift; tense is past simple which is correct. Suggestion: use 'bought' to clearly indicate purchase rather than movement.

× I think at UMM it's all about my passion about driving biscuits and so it was.

✓ I think at UMM it was all about my passion for riding bikes, and it remained that way.

Multiple problems: incorrect vocabulary ('driving biscuits') and awkward structure. Replace 'about' with 'for' after 'passion' and use correct noun 'riding bikes'. Keep past tense 'was' to match context. Suggestion: choose accurate words and simplify the structure.

× It was great subject for me and it means a lot to me.

✓ It was a great subject for me and it means a lot to me.

Missing article 'a' before 'great subject' (article error also), and mixed tense is acceptable because 'was' (past) and 'means' (present) can both be true. Add 'a' to correct noun phrase. Suggestion: include articles before singular countable nouns.

× Do you think bikes are popular in your country?

✓ Do you think bikes are popular in your country?

This question is correctly formed in the present simple asking for a general truth. No correction needed.

× Yeah, actually, I think it it's a very popular human country.

✓ Yeah, actually, I think they are very popular in my country.

Original mixes subject and noun incorrectly ('a very popular human country' is nonsensical). Use plural pronoun 'they' referring to 'bikes' and 'in my country' for location. Keep present simple. Suggestion: ensure pronouns agree with the noun and express location with 'in'.

× It's very common from my perspective at a very good, very, very good surprise, very good surprise for kids.

✓ From my perspective, they're very common and a great surprise for kids.

Original has misplaced prepositions and repeated phrases. Use 'from my perspective' at start, 'they're' to refer to bikes, and 'a great surprise for kids' as a concise noun phrase. Suggestion: place prepositional phrases correctly and avoid repetition.

× Kids a lot like it a lot.

✓ Kids like them a lot.

Word order and pronoun reference are wrong. Use 'Kids like them a lot' (plural pronoun 'them' for bikes) and avoid duplicate 'a lot'. Suggestion: keep subject-verb-object order and use correct pronoun number.

× And my country, if you give any kids, if you give any kids this spike at at.

✓ In my country, if you give any kid a bike, they will be very happy.

Original is ungrammatical and contains repeated fragments and wrong word 'spike'. Recast sentence: 'In my country' introduces context, 'if you give any kid a bike' is a conditional, and 'they will be very happy' completes the idea. Suggestion: use clear conditional structure and correct vocabulary.