Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct small grammar issues. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid 'me and my brother' — use 'my brother and I'.

例: Yes. I had a bike when I was a child. My brother and I each had our own bikes, and we often rode together to the nearby park to race and practice tricks. This made our weekends lively and helped me become more confident on two wheels.

提案: Organize the answer with a clear opinion first, then give two specific reasons using linking words. Avoid filler words like 'uh' and vague phrases such as 'everything is digitalized' — be more precise (e.g., 'smartphones and video games').

例: I don’t think bikes are as popular now as they used to be. Mainly, children prefer smartphones and video games, so they spend more time indoors; consequently, fewer families encourage outdoor cycling. As a result, park gatherings and informal bike races among kids have become less common.

× Me and my brother both had our own bikes and we used to go on a ride quite often near the park in our house.

✓ My brother and I both had our own bikes and we used to go for rides quite often near the park by our house.

Use subject pronouns in subject position: 'My brother and I' is correct, not 'Me and my brother'. Also reorder to put 'I' last as polite style. Replace 'go on a ride' with the more natural plural 'go for rides' when describing habitual activity, and 'near the park by our house' clarifies location.

× I would say no. Uh, bikes were pretty popular in the past in my country but since now everything is digitalized, kids are now more inclined towards steps and mobile phones rather than bikes.

✓ I would say no. Bikes were pretty popular in the past in my country, but now that everything is digitalized, kids are more inclined towards tablets and mobile phones rather than bikes.

The phrase 'since now' is incorrect for indicating a current cause; use 'now that' or just 'now'. 'Kids are now more inclined' is redundant with 'now' twice; remove redundancy. 'Steps' is likely a wrong word here; 'tablets' fits context. Ensure present tense 'are more inclined' is used consistently for current tendency.

× In our times we used to ride together in the park and play together, but nowadays indoor games are more popular.

✓ In our time we used to ride together in the park and play together, but nowadays indoor games are more popular.

'In our times' is awkward; 'in our time' is more natural when referring to the period when the speaker was young. The rest of the sentence is grammatically correct; no -ing form change required beyond this wording fix.