Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct small mistakes. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct the incomplete phrase “I learned it in.” and avoid repeating the same idea. Also vary vocabulary slightly (e.g., “mastered” or “picked it up”).

例: Yes. I had a bike from when I was about eight, and it was a bright red model. My father taught me to ride, and I picked it up within two days, which surprised both of us. Overall it was great fun and gave me a lot of confidence outdoors.

提案: Provide a clear estimate and justify it with a reason or example, avoid hesitation phrases like “I suppose” repeated and the unclear phrase “population knows.” Use linking words to explain why they are popular (e.g., cheap, convenient, environmental).

例: Yes, I think bicycles are quite popular. I would estimate about a third of people in my city use them for short trips because they are inexpensive and often faster than cars in heavy traffic. For example, many students and office workers cycle to save time and money.

× My dad taught me how to ride my bike and I learned it in.

✓ My dad taught me how to ride my bike and I learned it in two days.

The original sentence ends with a preposition 'in' but lacks the time expression. The intended meaning is that the skill was learned within a time period. Adding 'two days' completes the time phrase and keeps the past tense consistent. Suggestion: include the time period after 'in' or use 'within two days' for clarity.'

× I learned it within two days.

✓ I learned it within two days.

This sentence is already correct in tense and meaning. It clearly states the past completion of learning within a two-day period. No change needed.'

× I suppose 1/3 of the population knows.

✓ I suppose one third of the population knows.

Using a numeric fraction '1/3' in spoken sentences is acceptable but in formal written speech it is clearer to write 'one third'. There is no verb form error, but consistency and clarity recommend spelling out the fraction. Also 'knows' is odd with 'one third of the population' because 'know' what is unspecified; however grammatically 'knows' agrees with the singular collective noun 'one third' as treated as a unit. Suggestion: specify what they know or use 'use bicycles' to match the context.'

× Sorry, I suppose 1/3 of the people in my city use bike as a transportation tool.

✓ Sorry, I suppose one third of the people in my city use bikes as a means of transportation.

Errors: '1/3' should be spelled out as 'one third' for clarity; 'use bike' is incorrect because 'bike' needs plural 'bikes' when referring to people using them in general; 'a transportation tool' is an awkward collocation in English. 'Means of transportation' or 'as transportation' is more natural. Also keep tense/perspective consistent. Suggestion: use 'use bikes as a means of transportation' or 'use bicycles for transportation'.' }]} continuous=false}