Study— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer needs to be more natural and grammatically correct. Try to start with a clear topic sentence and then provide specific reasons using correct vocabulary and sentence structure. Avoid redundancy and unclear phrases.

例: I am a senior high school student majoring in social science. I chose this field because I am interested in human behaviour and subjects like sociology, geography, and history.

提案: Make sure to form complete sentences and use correct prepositions. Provide clear and specific information about your school, and avoid vague or awkward phrases. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: I study in the capital city, North Jakarta, at a prestigious institute. It is well-known for its excellent education and has one of the highest tuition fees in Indonesia.

提案: Your answer should be clearer and more coherent. Use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid filler words like 'uh'. Also, check your grammar and word choice to express your opinion effectively.

例: Absolutely, it is a great place to study because it offers excellent facilities and the teaching staff are very supportive. I enjoy studying there as the learning environment is comfortable and helps me focus.

提案: Try to use formal language and avoid contractions like 'wanna' and fillers such as 'umm'. Structure your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details using linking words.

例: I would not like any changes because the environment at my school is very convenient. It helps me concentrate better when I study.

提案: Your answer lacks clarity and organisation. Avoid fillers and use linking words to connect your ideas. Provide a clear statement about your plans and explain your reasoning with specific details.

例: At the moment, I do not have specific future study plans. I am focusing on doing well in my final exams and hope to apply to a good college or university afterwards.

× I'm Senior High School student majoring in social science.

✓ I'm a Senior High School student majoring in social science.

The sentence is missing the indefinite article 'a' before the singular noun 'Senior High School student'. In English, singular countable nouns require an article or determiner. Adding 'a' corrects the sentence.

× I love to learn about behaviour human and about humanity such as sociology as especially and geography and then histo history subject.

✓ I love to learn about human behaviour and about humanity, especially subjects such as sociology, geography, and history.

The original sentence has incorrect word order and awkward phrasing. 'Behaviour human' should be 'human behaviour'. The phrase 'such as sociology as especially' is incorrect; 'especially' should precede the examples. Also, 'histo history subject' is a repetition and misspelling; it should be 'history'. The correction improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Study in capital city on the North Jakarta, specifically institute school.

✓ I study in the capital city of North Jakarta, specifically at an institute school.

The original sentence lacks a subject and uses incorrect prepositions. 'Study' needs a subject 'I'. 'On the North Jakarta' should be 'of North Jakarta' to indicate location. Also, 'specifically institute school' needs the preposition 'at' and an article 'an' before 'institute school'.

× It's really incredible school and one of the prestigious school in Indonesia because it's the most expensive tuition fee.

✓ It's a really incredible school and one of the most prestigious schools in Indonesia because it has the most expensive tuition fee.

The sentence is missing the indefinite article 'a' before 'really incredible school'. 'One of the prestigious school' should be 'one of the most prestigious schools' to correctly use plural form after 'one of the'. Also, 'because it's the most expensive tuition fee' is incorrect; it should be 'because it has the most expensive tuition fee' to indicate possession.

× It's really perfect place to study because the offers excellent facilities and teaching staff is really, uh gracious and I really enjoy studying there because it's rough.

✓ It's a really perfect place to study because it offers excellent facilities and the teaching staff is really gracious. I really enjoy studying there because it's great.

The sentence is missing the indefinite article 'a' before 'really perfect place'. 'The offers' is incorrect; it should be 'it offers'. 'Teaching staff is really, uh gracious' needs the definite article 'the' before 'teaching staff'. The word 'rough' is likely a misuse; 'great' fits better in context. The correction improves grammar and clarity.

× I agree learning environment and make me convenience.

✓ I agree that the learning environment makes me feel comfortable.

The original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. 'I agree learning environment' lacks a conjunction and article; it should be 'I agree that the learning environment...'. 'Make me convenience' is incorrect; 'make me feel comfortable' or 'makes me comfortable' is correct. The correction clarifies meaning and corrects pronoun and verb usage.

× I don't wanna do any changes in my place because I think in my place now it's really convenient environment and umm, it's really helped me to concentrate better if I want to study.

✓ I don't want to make any changes to my place because I think my current environment is really convenient and it really helps me concentrate better when I want to study.

'Wanna' is informal and should be 'want to' in formal speech. 'Do any changes' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'make any changes'. 'In my place' should be 'to my place' or 'in my place' depending on context; here 'to my place' is better. 'It's really helped me' should be present tense 'it really helps me' to match the habitual action. 'If I want to study' is better as 'when I want to study' to indicate habitual condition.

× Actually I don't really have future study plans because I just umm study and do the best for the final exam and yeah I just wanted to apply the best college or university for future but I don't have really study plan.

✓ Actually, I don't really have future study plans because I just study and do my best for the final exam. I want to apply to the best college or university in the future, but I don't really have a study plan.

The sentence mixes tenses inconsistently. 'I just umm study and do the best' should be 'do my best' for correct expression. 'I just wanted to apply' should be present tense 'I want to apply' to match current intentions. 'For future' should be 'in the future'. 'I don't have really study plan' is incorrect; it should be 'I don't really have a study plan' with correct adverb placement and article usage.