Study— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear but a bit long and slightly redundant. Try to be more concise and avoid repeating the school name twice. Also, use simpler phrasing for naturalness.

例: I am a student at Lotus Valley International School in Noida.

提案: Your answer is direct but contains a factual error or unclear phrase ('author Pradesh'). Make sure to pronounce and name places correctly. Also, avoid repeating 'currently studying' as it was mentioned before.

例: I study at Lotus Valley International School in Uttar Pradesh.

提案: Your answer is detailed and well-structured but a bit long and repetitive. Try to use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and avoid repeating phrases like 'my school'.

例: Yes, I think my school is a great place to study because it emphasizes both theoretical and practical knowledge. Moreover, the teachers are caring and always ready to answer questions. Additionally, the school offers many extracurricular activities.

提案: Your answer has good content but the grammar and sentence structure need improvement for clarity. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid fragmented sentences.

例: I have always wanted our summer holiday projects to be more practical and related to our subjects. Fortunately, this year they changed the approach. For example, in my business studies project, I had to create a complete business plan, which I really enjoyed.

提案: Your answer is clear and relevant but could be improved by combining sentences for better flow and correcting minor grammar errors (e.g., 'higher education's' should be 'higher education').

例: In the future, I plan to go to the United States for higher education, which is one of the main reasons I am taking this exam. I intend to major in business studies and possibly minor in computer science.

× I am currently a school student studying in Great Wealth and Lotus Valley International School, Noida.

✓ I am currently a school student studying at Great Wealth and Lotus Valley International School, Noida.

The preposition 'at' is used to indicate the location of an institution where someone studies, rather than 'in'. Using 'at' is more appropriate for schools and similar places.

× I am currently studying in Lotus Valley International School, Noida which is in author Pradesh.

✓ I am currently studying at Lotus Valley International School, Noida which is in Uttar Pradesh.

Again, 'at' is the correct preposition to indicate the place of study. Also, 'author Pradesh' is a typo and should be corrected to 'Uttar Pradesh'.

× My school offered also offers a variety of extracurricular activities.

✓ My school also offers a variety of extracurricular activities.

The phrase 'offered also offers' is redundant and incorrect. The correct present tense verb is 'offers'. Also, the adverb 'also' should be placed before the verb for proper sentence flow.

× I had always wanted that my school projects that we get for the summer holidays. Be more practical that they should be connected to the subjects that we are learning.

✓ I have always wanted the school projects we get for the summer holidays to be more practical and connected to the subjects we are learning.

The original sentences are fragmented and incorrectly structured. Combining them into one sentence with proper verb forms and conjunctions improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× And that is something that they have fixed this year, this year for my business studies project that I have gotten a task to actually make a whole business plan, which is something I really liked.

✓ And that is something they have fixed this year. For my business studies project, I was given a task to actually make a whole business plan, which is something I really liked.

The phrase 'I have gotten' is informal and awkward here; 'I was given' is more appropriate. Also, splitting the long sentence into two improves readability and correctness.

× In the future I am planning on going to the United States for my higher education's which is one of the main reasons why I am giving this exam.

✓ In the future, I am planning on going to the United States for my higher education, which is one of the main reasons why I am taking this exam.

The word 'education's' is incorrect; it should be 'education' without an apostrophe. Also, 'giving this exam' is better expressed as 'taking this exam'. Adding a comma after 'In the future' improves sentence flow.

× And maybe a minor in computer science.

✓ I may also pursue a minor in computer science.

The original sentence is a fragment lacking a subject and verb. Rewriting it as a complete sentence clarifies the meaning and improves grammatical correctness.