Study— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to give a clear and direct response with correct grammar. For example, start with a clear statement about your current status and then add a brief explanation about your plans.

例: I am currently a student. I completed my senior secondary education in 2023, and now I am planning to pursue further studies abroad.

提案: Your answer is confusing and contains unclear phrases. Focus on giving a clear description of your school, its name, and some specific features. Use linking words to connect your ideas logically.

例: I studied at Motown Public School, which has a good reputation for quality education. Moreover, the school building is well-equipped with organized facilities, and the environment is peaceful and calm, which helps students concentrate better.

提案: Your answer is generally positive but has grammatical mistakes and some unclear phrases. Try to use correct grammar and more precise vocabulary. Use linking words to make your answer coherent.

例: Definitely yes, the school has very good facilities. Moreover, the classrooms are specially designed to support different learning abilities. Also, the peaceful environment makes it a very good place to study.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains irrelevant or incorrect words. Focus on giving a clear opinion and supporting it with reasons. Avoid unnecessary words and ensure correct grammar.

例: No, I don't think any changes are needed. The school is well organized and maintains good discipline. Overall, it is an ideal place for students to pursue their education.

提案: Your answer is clear but can be improved by using more precise vocabulary and linking words. Also, avoid informal phrases like 'So that's all.'

例: I plan to pursue a Bachelor of Commerce degree because I want to start my own business in the future. This course will provide me with the necessary knowledge and skills to achieve my goal.

× Basically I'm a student, I passed out my seniors can re in the year 2023 as now I'm planning for my further studies in abroad.

✓ Basically I'm a student, I passed out in the year 2023 and now I'm planning for my further studies abroad.

The phrase 'passed out my seniors can re' is incorrect and unclear. The correct phrase is 'passed out in the year 2023' meaning graduated. Also, 'in abroad' is incorrect; 'abroad' does not require a preposition here. The sentence is corrected to use proper past tense and preposition usage.

× Well, I studied at Motown school which is named as she put her pushing public school funding refusal SharePoint and it has a very good level of education.

✓ Well, I studied at Motown School, which is named She Put Her Pushing Public School Funding Refusal SharePoint, and it has a very good level of education.

The sentence has unclear naming but focusing on grammar, 'named as' should be 'named' without 'as'. Also, proper nouns like school names should be capitalized. The sentence is corrected to remove 'as' after 'named' and capitalize proper nouns.

× Moreover, the building of that school was very more with more organized equipments and also the environment of the experience is very peaceful and calm.

✓ Moreover, the building of that school was much better with more organized equipment, and also the environment is very peaceful and calm.

'Very more' is incorrect; 'much better' or 'more organized' is appropriate. 'Equipments' is incorrect as 'equipment' is uncountable. 'Environment of the experience' is awkward; 'environment' suffices. The sentence is corrected for adjective use and uncountable noun.

× Definitely yes, it has a very good facilities and moreover the classrooms are specially designed for extra abilities to learn from their.

✓ Definitely yes, it has very good facilities and moreover the classrooms are specially designed for extra abilities to learn from there.

'A very good facilities' is incorrect because 'facilities' is plural and should not have 'a'. Also, 'their' is a possessive pronoun, but the correct word here is 'there' indicating place. The sentence is corrected for quantifier and pronoun use.

× Moreover also the environment is very peaceful of that of this school so it is very good place to study.

✓ Moreover, the environment of this school is very peaceful, so it is a very good place to study.

The phrase 'environment is very peaceful of that of this school' is awkward and incorrect. It should be 'environment of this school is very peaceful'. Also, 'very good place' needs an article 'a'. The sentence is corrected for preposition and article use.

× Hello, I don't think so. I would make changes in their beer. I study because all of these things are very well organized and well mannered.

✓ Hello, I don't think so. I would not make changes in the place where I study because all of these things are very well organized and well mannered.

'Their beer' is incorrect and unclear. It seems the student meant 'the place where I study'. Also, 'well mannered' is better replaced with 'well managed' or 'well maintained' but kept as is for minimal correction. The sentence is corrected for pronoun misuse and clarity.

× So the overall that place was very ideal to pursue education for students.

✓ So overall, that place is very ideal to pursue education for students.

The sentence uses past tense 'was' but the context suggests a present general statement about the place. Changing 'was' to 'is' corrects the tense. Also, 'the overall' is awkward; 'overall' alone suffices.

× Well, I want to pursue my further education in Bachelor of Commerce as I want to open up my own self, my own business in future.

✓ Well, I want to pursue my further education in Bachelor of Commerce as I want to open up my own business in the future.

'In future' should be 'in the future' to be grammatically correct. Also, 'my own self' is unnecessary and awkward. The sentence is corrected for article use and clarity.