School— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 문법과 표현의 정확성을 높이고 문장을 간결하게 구성하세요. 장소를 말할 때는 정확한 지명 표기와 자연스러운 전치사 사용이 필요합니다. 예: 'Ann AM' 대신 정확한 지명 표기(예: Anam)를 사용하고, 'in the suburbs of Seoul'처럼 관사와 전치사를 올바르게 쓰세요. 또한 중복 표현(very ... very)과 어순 오류를 줄이고 문장을 2문장 이내로 정리하세요.

例: I study at Korea University, which is located in Anam, Seoul. It's in the suburbs of the city, so the area is relatively quiet and not very crowded.

提案: 의미가 혼란스러운 표현을 바로잡고 긍정적인 이유를 명확히 제시하세요. 'isn't substantially known for'처럼 부정형 표현은 의도와 다르게 들릴 수 있으니 피하세요. 대신 캠퍼스 풍경과 식당 음식에 대해 구체적이고 간결하게 말하세요. 연결어(for example, also)를 사용해 문장을 자연스럽게 이어주세요.

例: Yes, I love my school. The campus is beautiful with lots of trees and traditional buildings, and the cafeteria serves delicious and affordable meals, which makes campus life pleasant.

提案: 생각을 더 논리적으로 전개하고 반복을 피하세요. 이유를 제시할 때는 연결어(because, since, therefore)를 적절히 사용하고, 'course course' 같은 반복 실수를 제거하세요. 구체적인 예(도서관, 연구시설, 튜터링 등)을 추가하면 설득력이 높아집니다.

例: Yes, I think Korea University is an excellent place to study because many high-achieving and motivated students attend. As a result, the academic atmosphere is very stimulating, and facilities like the library and peer mentoring programs help students succeed.

提案: 어휘 선택과 문장 의미가 어색하므로 정확한 단어를 사용하세요. 'increasing'이나 'insidious'는 문맥에 맞지 않습니다. 대신 'friendly and supportive'처럼 간단하고 명확한 형용사를 쓰고, 교사와 학생의 행동을 구체적으로 설명하세요. 예시 문장은 구조를 정리해 2~3문장으로 표현하세요.

例: The atmosphere at my school is very friendly and supportive. Teachers are helpful and explain things clearly, and students often work together in group study areas and active clubs.

提案: 내용을 더 명확하게 정리하세요. 'interesting study' 대신 'interest in studying'를 쓰고, 이유를 논리적으로 제시하세요. 직업 선택과 개인의 흥미를 언급할 때는 연결어(especially, however)를 사용해 대비를 분명히 하세요. 문장을 2문장 이내로 간결하게 만드세요.

例: I believe interest in studying is very important because it helps you stay motivated and choose a career that suits you. However, personal passion is even more crucial, as doing what you enjoy usually leads to better long-term success.

× It's very suburbs of Seoul, so it's very least crowded and peaceful.

✓ It's in the suburbs of Seoul, so it's less crowded and peaceful.

Use singular/plural and correct noun phrase: 'suburbs' is plural and requires the preposition 'in' and the determiner 'the'. Also 'least' is incorrect contextually; comparative 'less' compares crowding relative to other places. Suggestion: say 'in the suburbs' and use 'less crowded'.

× my school campus isn't substantially known for its beautiful landscape outlook and my school's cafeteria has very delicious food.

✓ My school campus isn't particularly known for its beautiful landscape, but my school's cafeteria has very delicious food.

Verb form 'isn't' is correct for third person, but 'substantially known' is unnatural; 'particularly known' or 'especially known' fits. 'Landscape outlook' is not standard; use 'landscape' or 'scenery'. Also sentence needed conjunction 'but' for contrast. Suggestion: replace 'substantially' with 'particularly' and 'landscape outlook' with 'landscape'.

× Korea University is a very good place to study because many high achieving students attend it.

✓ Korea University is a very good place to study because many high-achieving students attend it.

Sentence structure is mostly correct but 'high achieving' should be hyphenated when used as a compound adjective before a noun: 'high-achieving'. Suggestion: add hyphen.

× Because students are highly motivated and competitive, the academic atmosphere is strong and helps everyone achieve their course course.

✓ Students are highly motivated and competitive, so the academic atmosphere is strong and helps everyone complete their courses.

Starting a sentence with 'Because' followed by another main clause caused a fragment when combined improperly. Also 'achieve their course course' is incorrect phrasing; use 'complete their courses' or 'succeed in their courses'. Suggestion: remove initial 'Because' or join clauses correctly and replace duplicated word with 'complete their courses'.

× The environment in my school is very friendly and increasing, with teachers who are supportive and very insidious take for class and classmates who collaborate well.

✓ The environment at my school is very friendly and encouraging, with teachers who are supportive and take great care in class, and classmates who collaborate well.

Several word choice errors: 'increasing' is incorrect — 'encouraging' fits the context. 'Insidious' is wrong and has negative meaning; likely intended 'considerate' or 'take great care'. 'Take for class' is ungrammatical; use 'take great care in class'. Also use preposition 'at my school'. Suggestion: replace incorrect adjectives and fix phrase order.

× I think interesting study is also important because we have to find our job that we have to do in the future, but more importantly, what I want to do is more important.

✓ I think studying something that interests me is also important because we need to find the job we will do in the future, but more importantly, what I want to do matters most.

Tense and noun usage: 'interesting study' is not idiomatic — use 'studying something that interests me' or 'interesting studies'. 'Have to find our job that we have to do' is repetitive; use 'find the job we will do'. 'Is more important' repetition is awkward; use 'matters most'. Suggestion: rephrase for clarity and correct present/future reference.