Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more grammatical, concise and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct verb forms and word choice (e.g., 'I enjoy taking photos of different views', 'I often photograph the sea, beaches, mountains and other natural scenes'). Avoid redundant fragments and unrelated phrases.

例: I enjoy taking photos of different views. For example, I often photograph the sea, beaches and mountains because I like capturing natural beauty. Also, I prefer clear skies since they make the colors and details stand out.

提案: Give a direct answer first, then compare with clear linking words and specific reasons. Use correct grammar (plural/singular, verb agreement) and smoother expressions (e.g., 'urban areas feel lively' and 'rural areas feel peaceful'). Limit to up to five sentences and avoid filler sounds like 'uh'.

例: I like both urban and rural views for different reasons. Urban areas feel lively and colorful, so photos there look energetic, while rural areas feel peaceful and make me focus on natural details. Therefore I choose based on the mood I want to convey.

提案: Answer directly and give concise reasons with linking words. Correct redundancy and grammar (e.g., avoid repeating 'my country' and fix word order). Provide a contrast when mentioning the other countries. Be specific about what is familiar or attractive.

例: I prefer views in my own country because they are familiar and connected to my hometown memories. However, I also appreciate views in other countries for their different architecture and landscapes, so I sometimes enjoy photographing them too.

× Yes I found off take a photo with a lot of views such as sea, beach, mountain or nature view.

✓ Yes, I like taking photos of many different views such as the sea, beaches, mountains, or natural scenery.

The original sentence has incorrect verb choice and word order ('found off take'), missing articles, and incorrect noun forms. Suggest using 'like taking photos' to match the question, pluralize countable nouns ('photos', 'beaches', 'mountains'), and use 'natural scenery' for 'nature view'. Use commas to separate items and add 'the' where appropriate.

× Either way take a photo with my plan that I planting and sitting.

✓ Sometimes I take photos of my plants while I am sitting.

The original mixes forms incorrectly ('take a photo with my plan that I planting and sitting'). Use 'take photos' and the gerund/present continuous properly: 'I am sitting' and 'my plants'. Rephrase to clear meaning: 'take photos of my plants while I am sitting.'

× I always take a photo with a clear sky because I love.

✓ I always take photos when the sky is clear because I love clear skies.

Sentence uses 'with a clear sky' awkwardly and ends with incomplete clause 'because I love.' Use 'when the sky is clear' and complete the reason 'because I love clear skies.' Also pluralize 'photos' for general habit.

× I think urban area and rural area is different feeling when I take a photo but I think I like both because it's make my different feelings.

✓ I think urban and rural areas give different feelings when I take photos, but I like both because they create different emotions in me.

Errors include singular/plural mismatch ('urban area and rural area' -> 'urban and rural areas'), subject-verb agreement ('is different feeling' -> 'give different feelings'), and awkward phrase 'it's make my different feelings.' Use 'they create different emotions in me' and plural 'photos'.

× Such as uh if I take a photo, urban area is make my feeling vivid but rural area make me peace.

✓ For example, when I take a photo in an urban area, it makes me feel vivid, but a rural area makes me feel peaceful.

Original has incorrect verb forms ('is make', 'make me peace') and awkward word choices. Use 'it makes me feel' and 'feel peaceful'. Also include articles 'an urban area' and 'a rural area' or use plural as above.

× I prefer my country because my country is very familiar for me because I this is my birth town, this is my hometown.

✓ I prefer my country because it is very familiar to me; this is my birth town and my hometown.

Repeating 'my country' is redundant; use pronoun 'it'. Preposition should be 'familiar to me' not 'for me'. 'Because I this is' is ungrammatical; separate clauses and use semicolon or conjunction. Use 'birth town' corrected to 'birthplace' or 'birth town' consistently.

× But sometime I think the other country is very beautiful.

✓ But sometimes I think other countries are very beautiful.

Use plural 'sometimes' and pluralize 'countries' when speaking generally. Use present simple 'are' for general truth. 'The other country' implies a specific country; 'other countries' is more natural here.