Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cải thiện: Tránh tiếng ậm ừ (uh), sử dụng câu mở chủ đề rõ ràng, ngắn gọn và bổ sung chi tiết cụ thể. Ví dụ: nêu thiết bị bạn dùng, loại cảnh bạn thích chụp, và lý do rõ ràng cho việc chia sẻ ảnh. Hạn chế lặp từ và giữ đúng ngữ pháp số nhiều/ít (family and friends).

例: Yes, I love taking photos of different views. I go for a walk every day with my smartphone to capture landscapes, especially parks and rivers. I usually edit a few shots and share them with my family and friends because their feedback motivates me and helps me improve.

提案: Cải thiện: Trả lời trực tiếp bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng, sửa ngữ pháp (I enjoy rural areas), loại bỏ tiếng ậm ừ, và cung cấp lý do cụ thể, có liên kết logic. Nên dùng linking words (because, although, while) để giải thích cảm xúc và so sánh. Tránh từ không chính xác như "press air" hay "unwise"; thay bằng "noise, traffic, and pollution" và "stressed" hoặc "less relaxed".

例: I prefer rural areas to urban ones because rural places are quieter and less crowded. For example, I enjoy walking in the countryside where there is fresh air and peaceful scenery, while cities often have noise and traffic that make me feel stressed.

提案: Cải thiện: Bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng và tiếp tục với lý do cụ thể cho cả hai lựa chọn. Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp và cấu trúc (e.g. "I enjoy both" not "Me personally"; tránh câu không hoàn chỉnh). Thêm ví dụ cụ thể: đặc điểm cảnh trong nước so với nước ngoài. Dùng linking words như "on the one hand... on the other hand..." để mạch lạc.

例: I enjoy views in both my own country and abroad. On the one hand, local landscapes are familiar and comforting — I appreciate everyday scenes like my neighborhood lake and nearby mountains. On the other hand, views in other countries offer new scenery and cultural variety, such as coastal cliffs or historic city skylines, which I find exciting and inspiring.

× Absolutely yes. I only go for a walk, uh, every single day to capture pictures of scenery.

✓ Absolutely yes. I go for a walk every single day to take pictures of the scenery.

Student omitted or misused articles and used awkward verb phrase. Use 'go for a walk' without 'only' for clarity, or keep 'only' if intended: 'I only go for a walk' changes meaning. Use 'take pictures' (more natural) and add the definite article 'the' before 'scenery' to refer to specific scenery. Suggestion: 'I go for a walk every single day to take pictures of the scenery.' Notes: 'the scenery' is correct because the speaker refers to the surrounding views in general context.

× So I want to share my picture to my family and friend and get uh, and receive their compliment.

✓ So I want to share my pictures with my family and friends and receive their compliments.

Problems: incorrect preposition ('share ... to' should be 'share ... with'), singular/plural agreement with 'picture/friend/compliment'. Use plural 'pictures', 'friends', and 'compliments' to match typical usage. Also 'receive' is fine but 'get' is redundant. Suggestion: 'So I want to share my pictures with my family and friends and receive their compliments.'

× Honestly I am enjoyed rural area rather than urban area because I guess uh urban area has before and press air to for me to enjoy and they make me feel relaxed and unwise sometime.

✓ Honestly, I enjoy rural areas rather than urban areas because I guess urban areas have fresher and less polluted air for me to enjoy, and they make me feel relaxed and peaceful sometimes.

Errors: incorrect verb tense 'am enjoyed' should be simple present 'I enjoy'. Article and number errors: use plural 'rural areas'/'urban areas'. Phrases 'has before and press air to for me to enjoy' are incorrect; likely intended 'fresher and less polluted air'. 'Unwise' is wrong word; use 'peaceful' or 'unwinding' to express relaxing. 'Sometime' should be 'sometimes'. Suggestion: 'I enjoy rural areas rather than urban areas because they have fresher, less polluted air and make me feel relaxed and peaceful sometimes.'

× Me personally, I enjoy both of them.

✓ Personally, I enjoy both.

'Me personally' is informal and ungrammatical as a sentence starter; use 'Personally,' or 'For me,'. 'Both of them' is redundant when context is clear; 'both' suffices. Suggestion: 'Personally, I enjoy both.'

× On the one hand, in my country I always see it every single day and still appreciate my life.

✓ On the one hand, in my country I see the scenery every single day and still appreciate my life.

Problems: vague pronoun 'it' has no clear antecedent; replace with 'the scenery'. Word order 'in my country I always see it every single day' is acceptable but clearer as 'in my country I see the scenery every single day'. 'Appreciate my life' is okay but could be 'appreciate life' or 'appreciate what I have'. Suggestion: 'In my country I see the scenery every single day and still appreciate my life.'

× Had this view because it's so pretty talking and beautiful.

✓ I like this view because it's so pretty and beautiful.

Original is fragmentary and ungrammatical: 'Had this view' is not a correct clause in context. 'Pretty talking' is incorrect; likely meant 'so pretty and beautiful' or better 'so pretty'. Use subject 'I' and verb 'like' to form a complete sentence. Suggestion: 'I like this view because it's so pretty.'

× Anyway, yeah.

✓ Anyway, yes.

This short utterance is informal; no past tense needed. Change 'yeah' to standard 'yes' for formality. Note: no major grammar error but prefer 'yes' in formal speaking. Suggestion: 'Anyway, yes.'