Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clear, concise and natural. Start with a direct topic sentence (Yes, I do), correct vocabulary (use 'scenes' or 'views' not 'skins'), simplify grammar, and avoid extra words. Add one or two specific supporting details linked with a connector (e.g., 'for example' or 'because') to explain when and why you take photos.

例: Yes, I do. I enjoy photographing different views because they help me remember special moments. For example, I often take pictures of mountains and rivers when I visit the countryside, and I also photograph interesting café interiors when I go out with friends.

提案: Begin with a clear preference sentence (I prefer...). Use correct comparisons and accurate vocabulary (rural areas, not 'be used in'; 'packed' or 'rich in' rather than 'jacked'). Provide one or two specific reasons and link them with a connector (because, since, as a result). Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

例: I prefer rural areas to urban ones because they are rich in natural landscapes such as forests, rivers and ponds. As a result, I feel more relaxed and can take better nature photographs.

提案: Answer directly (I prefer...). Use correct grammar and specific details about your country. Replace unclear phrases ('my Nepali') with 'Nepal' and correct word choices ('attracts tourists'). Explain briefly why—mention specific features (mountains, culture, traditions) and link ideas with connectors. Limit to 2–3 concise sentences.

例: I prefer views in my own country, Nepal, because its dramatic mountains and diverse cultures are unique. For example, the Himalayan scenery and many local traditions attract tourists and give me many opportunities to learn about different languages and customs.

× As definitely I like to click picture of different skins which attracts me with your natural landscapes and I take a picture when I go outside like cafe or restaurant with my friends or sisters.

✓ I definitely like to take pictures of different scenes that attract me, such as natural landscapes, and I take pictures when I go out to cafes or restaurants with my friends or my sisters.

Errors: incorrect adverb placement ('As definitely'), wrong verb collocation ('click picture' -> 'take pictures'), wrong noun ('skins' should be 'scenes'), incorrect relative clause and pronoun usage ('which attracts me with your natural landscapes' is unclear), wrong preposition ('go outside like cafe' -> 'go out to cafes'), and awkward coordination. Suggestion: place adverb before main verb ('I definitely like'), use correct verb-noun collocation ('take pictures'), choose correct noun ('scenes' or 'views'), simplify relative clause ('that attract me' or 'such as natural landscapes'), and use plural forms where appropriate ('cafes', 'friends or my sisters').

× I prefer to be used in rural areas rather than urban areas which are jacked with their natural landscapes like forest, rivers, pond and helps me to enjoy and feel relaxed.

✓ I prefer rural areas to urban areas because rural places have natural landscapes like forests, rivers, and ponds, which help me relax and enjoy myself.

Errors: incorrect passive construction ('prefer to be used in' should be active 'prefer'), wrong comparative structure ('prefer X to Y'), singular/plural issues ('forest' -> 'forests', 'pond' -> 'ponds'), incorrect word choice ('jacked' is wrong), subject-verb agreement in relative clause ('and helps me' -> 'which help me'), and awkward phrasing. Suggestion: use 'prefer A to B', keep noun plurals consistent, use appropriate verbs ('have' or 'feature'), and make the relative clause agree with its antecedent ('landscapes... which help').

× I prefer to be using my own country rather than other countries because my Nepali is a beautiful landscapes which attacks the tourist. It has a multi language, multi traditional, multicultural which helps me to learn different kinds of.

✓ I prefer visiting places in my own country rather than in other countries because Nepal has beautiful landscapes that attract tourists. It has multiple languages and traditions and is multicultural, which helps me learn about different cultures.

Errors: wrong verb phrase ('prefer to be using' is unnatural; use 'prefer visiting' or 'prefer places in'), article and noun errors ('my Nepali' incorrect; should be 'Nepal' or 'my country'), singular/plural mismatch ('a beautiful landscapes' -> 'beautiful landscapes'), wrong verb choice ('attacks' -> 'attracts'), incorrect noun phrases ('multi language, multi traditional, multicultural' is inconsistent), and incomplete ending ('different kinds of' needs an object). Suggestion: use country name 'Nepal', plural 'landscapes', correct verb 'attract', and parallel noun phrases ('multiple languages and traditions' or 'is multicultural') and finish the thought ('different cultures').