Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Speak more fluently and correct basic grammar. Begin with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (uh), and use correct verbs (e.g., 'preserve' or 'keep' instead of 'reserve'). Keep the answer concise (1–3 sentences) and add one specific detail or example. Use linking words if adding details (for example, 'for instance' or 'for example').

例: Yes, I love taking pictures of different views because they help me preserve travel memories. For example, when I return from a trip with friends I usually display several photos on my desk so I can look back on those moments.

提案: Improve grammar and clarity: start with a direct topic sentence ('I prefer rural areas') then give concise, specific reasons. Avoid repetition and incorrect phrases ('the there are', 'I love a nature', 'it has me to relax'). Use linking words like 'because' and 'for example'. Aim for 2–3 clean sentences.

例: I prefer rural areas because they are quieter and more peaceful. For example, the countryside in my region has open fields and calm villages, which helps me relax after a busy week.

提案: Use correct verb forms and clearer phrasing. Start with a clear statement ('I prefer views in other countries') then provide a specific example. Check tense consistency and noun choices ('I visited Australia once', 'vibrant atmosphere', 'coastal scenery') and avoid vague endings. Keep it to 2–3 sentences and use linking words like 'for example' or 'for instance'.

例: I prefer views in other countries because the landscapes and cultures are quite different from what I'm used to. For instance, when I visited Australia I loved the coastal scenery and relaxed atmosphere, which felt refreshing compared with my busy hometown.

× Yes, I really love, uh, reserving memories when I travel, especially travel with my friends.

✓ Yes, I really love preserving memories when I travel, especially when I travel with my friends.

The original uses 'reserving' which is incorrect collocation; 'preserving memories' or 'capturing memories' is correct. Also missing 'when' before 'I travel with my friends' for clarity. Use of gerund 'preserving' after 'love' is appropriate.

× I when I come back home, I often pause on my table, uh, all of the photographs.

✓ When I come back home, I often pause at my table and look at all of the photographs.

The sentence has misplaced 'I' and incorrect verb 'pause on' for the intended meaning. Correct structure moves the time clause to the start and uses 'pause at my table and look at' to convey stopping to view photos. 'Pause on my table' is unidiomatic.

× To be honest, I really like rural areas more than urban areas because I know in urban areas the there are a lot of hustle and bustle.

✓ To be honest, I really like rural areas more than urban areas because in urban areas there is a lot of hustle and bustle.

Redundant words 'the there' must be removed. 'A lot of hustle and bustle' is a non-count noun phrase so use 'is' not 'are'. The original had incorrect quantifier/number agreement.

× However, in rural India, I really love a nature and something like that is very quiet and it has me to relax.

✓ However, in rural India, I really love nature; it is very quiet and helps me relax.

Do not use the indefinite article 'a' before uncountable noun 'nature'. Phrase 'something like that' is vague and unnecessary. 'It has me to relax' is ungrammatical; use 'helps me relax.'

× I prefer will in other countries because the landscape and the culture are often very different from what I used to.

✓ I prefer to travel in other countries because the landscape and the culture are often very different from what I am used to.

'Prefer will' is incorrect; use 'prefer to travel' or 'prefer being'. Also 'used to' needs 'am' to form 'be used to' meaning accustomed to. Tense and verb choice corrected to match present preference.

× For example, I visit this Australia once and love the villas, atmosphere and coastal scenery which feel refreshing compared with the busy.

✓ For example, I visited Australia once and loved the villas, atmosphere, and coastal scenery, which felt refreshing compared with the busy city.

Use simple past 'visited' and 'loved' for a completed action. 'This Australia' is incorrect—use 'Australia'. Add commas for item list and 'which felt' to match past. 'Compared with the busy' is incomplete; specify 'busy city' or 'busy urban life.'