Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Keep answers concise and correct some grammar and word choice. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, use linking words, and include a specific example. Correct collocations (e.g. “a picture lasts forever,” “remember it”) and reduce redundancy.

例: Yes, I do. I enjoy photographing different views because a good picture captures a moment and preserves memories. For example, last year I photographed a sunset on a mountain trail; looking at the photo always reminds me of the colours and the peaceful feeling.

提案: Provide a direct topic sentence then support with specific reasons and one linking phrase. Correct grammar (use singular/plural and articles) and avoid filler phrases like “it's everything about that.” Add a brief personal example to make it concrete.

例: I prefer rural views because they offer natural scenery and fresh air. For instance, I enjoy hiking by rivers and watching mountains at sunrise, which helps me relax and feel calm.

提案: Be more direct and fix sentence structure and tense/agreement errors. Avoid contradictory connectors (“although... but”). Use clearer linking words (however, and) and give a specific example of a local place to support your preference.

例: I prefer views in my own country because I find many landscapes are well preserved and familiar to me. For example, our coastal parks are carefully maintained and offer beautiful scenery both in cities and the countryside, so I often visit them on weekends.

× I love taking pictures in different views because it can capture the moment.

✓ I love taking pictures of different views because they can capture moments.

The pronoun and verb form are mismatched. 'Pictures' is plural, so refer to them with 'they' not 'it'. Also 'capture the moment' is better as 'capture moments' or 'capture the moment' with consistent article; using plural 'moments' suits the general statement. Use 'of different views' rather than 'in different views' for natural collocation.

× As people say, picture lasts forever.

✓ As people say, a picture lasts forever.

The noun 'picture' is countable and needs an article 'a' when singular. Without the article the sentence is ungrammatical. Alternatively use plural 'pictures last forever'. The corrected sentence uses the idiomatic singular proverb form.

× So because of the picture I can have something to remember on and it helps me to be more appreciative towards the scenery and also the moment.

✓ So because of the pictures I have something to remember, and they help me appreciate the scenery and the moment more.

Multiple issues: 'because of the picture' should be plural 'pictures' to match context; 'have something to remember on' is unidiomatic — use 'have something to remember' or 'something to remember by'. 'It helps me to be more appreciative towards' is wordy and uses awkward preposition 'towards'; use 'help me appreciate ... more'. Also keep pronouns consistent (pictures -> they). This correction addresses word choice, preposition, and pronoun agreement.

× I prefer the view in the rural area because whenever I say rural, my immediate thought will be the natures.

✓ I prefer the views in rural areas because whenever I say 'rural', my immediate thought is nature.

'The view in the rural area' is awkward; 'views in rural areas' is more natural and matches general preference. 'The natures' is incorrect — 'nature' is an uncountable noun and should not be pluralized. Also use present tense 'is' for habitual thoughts rather than 'will be'.

× It's about the mountains, the views, the river, the fresh air.

✓ It's about the mountains, the rivers, the views, and the fresh air.

List items should be parallel and consistent in number; 'the river' alone sounds odd among plural items. Use plural 'rivers' or keep all singular. Also include 'and' before the last item for natural speech.

× It makes me relax, it makes me calm.

✓ It makes me feel relaxed and calm.

Verb complement requires 'feel' plus adjective. 'Makes me relax' suggests causing the action 'to relax' which is less natural here. Use 'make someone feel relaxed' or 'help me relax'. Also combine into one clause with 'and'.

× In my country, of course, although it's undeniable that the views in other countries are very beautiful, but the views in my country is also almost the same.

✓ In my country, of course. Although the views in other countries are undeniably beautiful, the views in my country are almost the same.

This sentence has a sentence-fragment and redundant conjunctions ('although' with 'but'). Remove 'but' when using 'although' and avoid comma splices. Also fix subject-verb agreement: 'views ... are' not 'is'.

× We have a very well maintained, well preserved views here.

✓ We have very well-maintained, well-preserved views here.

'Views' is plural so do not use the article 'a'. Also compound adjectives before a noun should be hyphenated: 'well-maintained, well-preserved views'. Remove the extra article to match plural noun.

× Doesn't matter it's whether it's in rural or urban area.

✓ It doesn't matter whether it's in a rural or an urban area.

Original is ungrammatical and uses incorrect word order. Use 'It doesn't matter whether...' plus articles 'a rural or an urban area' for natural English. Alternatively 'whether it's in rural or urban areas' is acceptable.