Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clearer and more natural: start with a direct topic sentence, avoid repetition, correct key grammar (plural/singular, prepositions), and give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Keep it under five sentences.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different scenes, especially when I travel. For example, I often capture city skylines at sunset and quiet country roads in the morning. These photos help me remember the atmosphere of the places I visit, and I usually share the best ones with my friends.

提案: Answer directly (state your preference), avoid repetition, fix grammar (articles, verb forms) and organize supporting details with linking words. Give one clear reason and a brief example to make it specific.

例: I prefer rural views to urban ones because the countryside is quieter and more peaceful. For instance, I often photograph rivers and hills near where I live, and these scenes make me feel relaxed and calm.

提案: Be concise and avoid hesitation. State a clear preference, correct collocations and tenses, and give a specific contrast if you mention other countries. Use linking words (however, although) to make comparison coherent.

例: I prefer views in my own country because I am familiar with the landscapes, such as rivers and mountains, which make me feel relaxed. However, I also enjoy scenery abroad because it offers different cultures and architectural styles to photograph.

× Yes, I like taking picture of different ways, especially when I go for travel.

✓ Yes, I like taking pictures of different views, especially when I travel.

Use plural 'pictures' because 'taking pictures' is the common collocation for photographing multiple images. 'Ways' is incorrect choice; 'views' fits the context of scenic images. 'Go for travel' is unidiomatic; use 'travel' or 'go traveling'.

× Uh, this helps me.

✓ Uh, this helps me.

Sentence is grammatically correct; no correction needed. (No change required because present simple 'helps' correctly describes a habitual effect.)

× This helps me in the the night of the place I visited and after.

✓ This helps me remember the places I visited at night and afterwards.

Original has word order and article errors and awkward phrasing. Use 'remember the places I visited' to express benefit, 'at night' to indicate time, and 'afterwards' for 'and after'. Also remove duplicated 'the the'.

× I share with my friends.

✓ I share them with my friends.

Clarify the object: 'share' usually requires an object here ('them' refers to the pictures). Adding 'them' completes the transitive verb construction.

× Yes, I prefer fields in rural area because rural areas very quiet, peaceful and quite peaceful.

✓ Yes, I prefer rural areas because they are very quiet and peaceful.

Use 'rural areas' plural for general preference and include the verb 'are' for description. Remove redundant 'quite peaceful' and the incorrect singular 'rural area'.

× I live next like rivers, mountains, hills so I capture these moments and it made me very comfortable and feel me relaxed.

✓ I live near rivers, mountains and hills, so I capture these moments and they make me feel relaxed and comfortable.

Use preposition 'near' (not 'next like'). List items with commas and 'and'. Use present tense 'make' to match habitual action. 'Feel me relaxed' is incorrect order; use 'make me feel relaxed'.

× Oh I first of all I prefer views in my own country because they are familiar for me and I love the natures and it's like river, mountains and hills and they made me a feel relaxed.

✓ First of all, I prefer views in my own country because they are familiar to me and I love nature, such as rivers, mountains and hills, and they make me feel relaxed.

Remove redundant 'I'. Use 'familiar to me' not 'familiar for me'. 'Nature' is uncountable, not 'the natures'. Use 'such as' to introduce examples. Use present tense 'make' to match general truth and correct word order 'make me feel relaxed'.

× However, I also love love.

✓ However, I also love visiting other countries.

Original 'I also love love' is unclear and ungrammatical. Provide a coherent completion that fits the earlier question comparing own and other countries; 'visiting other countries' clarifies the meaning.