Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: ปรับประโยคให้ชัดเจนและลื่นไหล หลีกเลี่ยงการพูดซ้ำ (เช่น "whether whether") และจัดโครงสร้างเป็นประโยคหัวข้อแล้วตามด้วยรายละเอียดสั้นๆ ควรใช้คำที่เหมาะสม เช่น "architecture" และหลีกเลี่ยงคำทั่วไปอย่าง "things" ให้เจาะจงแทน

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. For example, I often capture cityscapes, building architecture, and atmospheric scenes because I like how light and structure interact.

提案: แก้คำผิดและการซ้ำซ้อน เช่น "wheels" และ "rural rural" และใช้โครงสร้างชัดเจน: เริ่มด้วยประโยคตอบชัดเจนตามด้วยเหตุผลและตัวอย่างสั้นๆ ใช้คำเชื่อมอย่าง "because" หรือ "because of" เพื่อความลื่นไหล

例: I prefer rural views because they make me feel relaxed and peaceful. For instance, quiet fields and country roads help me escape the noise and bustle of the city.

提案: ปรับประโยคให้มีความชัดเจนและเป็นธรรมชาติ ให้เริ่มตอบตรงๆ แล้วอธิบายเหตุผลหรือยกตัวอย่างที่เฉพาะเจาะจง หลีกเลี่ยงวลีคลุมเครืออย่าง "I started from TV" ที่ทำให้ความหมายไม่ชัด

例: I prefer views in other countries, especially China, because of its impressive landmarks and diverse destinations. For example, I saw pictures of the Great Wall and modern skylines on TV two years ago, which made me want to visit them in person.

× Yes. I prefer taking pictures of anything, whether whether it's atmosphere or things or architectures of some building that I find interesting.

✓ Yes. I prefer taking pictures of anything, whether it's the atmosphere, objects, or the architecture of buildings that I find interesting.

The speaker used 'architectures' (plural noun formed incorrectly) and repeated 'whether'. Use 'architecture' as an uncountable noun when referring to style or 'the architecture of buildings' for countable sense; 'things' is vague so 'objects' is clearer; remove duplicate 'whether'. Use commas to separate items in a list. Suggestions: remove duplicate words, use 'architecture' or 'the architecture of buildings', and list items with commas.

× I prefer wheels from rural rural area since whenever I whenever I think of it, it gives me a sense of relief.

✓ I prefer views from rural areas since whenever I think of them, they give me a sense of relief.

Multiple mistakes: 'wheels' is incorrect word choice; likely meant 'views'. 'rural rural area' is repeated and 'area' should be plural when speaking generally: 'rural areas'. Pronoun agreement: 'it' referring to 'views' (plural) should be 'them' and 'gives' should be 'give'. Remove repeated fragments. Suggestions: use correct noun 'views', avoid repetition, match plural subject with plural pronouns and verbs.

× On top of that, I don't like the bustling atmosphere.

✓ On top of that, I don't like the bustling atmosphere.

Sentence is grammatically acceptable; however, if speaking generally you could say 'bustling atmospheres' or keep singular 'the bustling atmosphere' if referring to a specific atmosphere. No correction required; included to note article use is fine.

× Personally, I like China views, I like its landmark, I like its destination.

✓ Personally, I like views of China; I like its landmarks and destinations.

'China views' is incorrect word order; use 'views of China'. 'landmark' and 'destination' should be plural when speaking generally: 'landmarks' and 'destinations'. Also combine clauses more naturally with semicolon or conjunction. Suggestions: use 'views of', pluralize general nouns, and vary sentence structure.

× I started from TV probably around 2 years ago that there are several places.

✓ I first started learning about these places from TV probably around two years ago.

Original sentence has incorrect structure and unclear meaning. 'Started from TV' and 'that there are several places' are awkward. Rephrase to 'I first started learning about these places from TV' and spell out numbers under ten as 'two'. Suggestions: clarify subject and verb, place time expressions appropriately, and avoid trailing clauses that do not connect.