Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally natural and relevant, but it is slightly wordy and has minor grammatical oddities (e.g., “for years” and “memorize them later” are awkward). Make your topic sentence clear, avoid redundancy, and use one supporting detail with a linking word. Also vary vocabulary (e.g., “preserve memories” instead of “remember”).

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views because they help me preserve memories of places and moments. For example, I often photograph city skylines and seaside sunsets so I can revisit those scenes later and recall how I felt.

提案: The answer communicates your preference but has grammar and coherence issues (e.g., “is greenery,” “How I also”). Keep sentences concise, correct subject-verb structures, and use a linking phrase to add the contrast. Be specific about what you like in each setting.

例: I prefer rural views because the wide open spaces, green fields, and fresh air help me relax and reduce stress. For example, I often walk in the countryside to clear my mind. However, I also appreciate urban views, such as city skylines at night, for their vibrant atmosphere.

提案: Clear idea and personal detail are good, but there is an awkward word choice (“species” should be “sites” or “cities”) and slight repetition. Use a clear linking word for contrast and give one concrete example of an overseas landscape. Choose precise vocabulary (e.g., “historic cityscapes” or “landmarks”).

例: I prefer views in my own country because they feel familiar and are linked to family memories, such as trips to nearby mountains and lakes. However, I also enjoy foreign views for their novelty, for example, dramatic coastal cliffs in other countries or historic cityscapes I’ve never seen before.

× Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because they help me remember the places and moments for years.

✓ Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because they help me remember places and moments for years.

Redundant article 'the' before plural nouns 'places' and 'moments' is unnecessary in this general statement. Removing 'the' makes the sentence more natural: 'remember places and moments.' Keep present tense 'enjoy' and 'help' to express habitual action.

× For example, I always photograph city skylines and seaside sunsets so that I can look back at them, memorize them later.

✓ For example, I always photograph city skylines and seaside sunsets so that I can look back at them and memorize them later.

Comma splice and missing conjunction: two verbs 'look back at them' and 'memorize them later' are coordinated actions; use 'and' to connect them. No past participle error per se but fits listed types as coordination of verbs (treated under Verb in past participle ID here per instruction). Keep 'can' for ability.

× I prefer views in rural areas because the open space is greenery and fresh air help me relax and feel less stressed.

✓ I prefer views in rural areas because the open spaces, greenery, and fresh air help me relax and feel less stressed.

Incorrect use of 'is greenery' and missing plural for 'open spaces.' Use nouns in a parallel list: 'open spaces, greenery, and fresh air' and plural 'spaces' to match general reference. This corrects adjective/noun usage and agreement.

× How I also appreciate certain urban views like city skylines at night for the energy.

✓ I also appreciate certain urban views, like city skylines at night, for their energy.

Sentence began with 'How' incorrectly and had awkward structure. Remove 'How', reorder to 'I also appreciate...', and use 'their' to refer back to 'urban views.' Commas set off the example phrase.

× I prefer views in my own country because they are familiar and often tied to personal memories such as family trips to local mountains or lakes.

✓ I prefer views in my own country because they are familiar and often tied to personal memories, such as family trips to local mountains or lakes.

Missing comma before 'such as' which introduces examples; not strictly an article error but fits listed types—add comma for clarity. Articles 'local mountains or lakes' are acceptable; keep present tense.

× However, I also enjoy views abroad for their novelty and different landscapes like coastal cliffs or historic city species.

✓ However, I also enjoy views abroad for their novelty and different landscapes, like coastal cliffs or historic cityscapes.

Incorrect word 'species' used instead of 'cityscapes.' 'Cityscapes' is the correct noun for city landscapes. Add comma before example. This fixes word choice (adjective/noun usage).