Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the response grammatical, concise, and add a clear topic sentence plus one or two specific supporting details. Reduce hesitations and fix verb forms (e.g., 'taking' → 'take', 'a nature' → 'nature'). Use linking words like 'because' and give a concrete example of what you photograph.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because photography helps me preserve memories. For example, I often photograph sunsets and mountain landscapes when I travel, since the colours and shapes change each time and remind me of where I was.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence stating your preference, then give two specific reasons using linking phrases like 'because' and 'for example'. Correct noun forms and articles (e.g., 'rural areas', 'the countryside'). Avoid repetition by using synonyms ('wildlife' instead of repeating 'nature').

例: I prefer views in rural areas because the countryside is surrounded by nature and offers peaceful scenery. For example, I can photograph wildlife, like birds and deer, and wide-open fields that you rarely find in cities.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and correct grammatical errors ('many cultural heritages' or 'a rich cultural heritage', 'Mount Abu hill station'). Provide specific reasons and an example, and avoid vague phrases like 'so it is very quiet to.' Use linking words such as 'because' and 'for instance'.

例: I prefer views in my own country because it has a rich cultural heritage and diverse natural landscapes. For instance, I enjoy photographing historical sites like the Taj Mahal and the peaceful hill station at Mount Abu, which offer striking architecture and tranquil scenes.

× Of course, I like to taking pictures of different views because, uh, it's uh, capturing the moment and I probably like to capture the views of a nature which, uh, can memorize my life.

✓ Of course, I like to take pictures of different views because it captures the moment, and I probably like to capture views of nature that can help me remember my life.

The verb following 'like to' should be the base form, not the -ing form (Error type 8). 'Like to taking' is incorrect; use 'like to take'. 'It's capturing the moment' is awkward here; using the simple present 'it captures the moment' is clearer. 'The views of a nature' is incorrect article and word order; use 'views of nature'. 'Can memorize my life' is unnatural; use 'help me remember my life' or 'help me preserve memories'.

× I prefer to view of rural areas because rural area is surrounded by nature and there you can take many pictures of nature and you may see many animals, birds are there.

✓ I prefer views of rural areas because rural areas are surrounded by nature, and there you can take many pictures and see many animals and birds.

Multiple issues: 'I prefer to view of rural areas' is ungrammatical—use 'I prefer views of rural areas' (singular/plural and noun form). 'Rural area is surrounded' should be plural 'rural areas are surrounded' for agreement and generality (Error type 1 and 27). The clause 'you may see many animals, birds are there' is incorrect structure; combine as 'see many animals and birds'. Also remove redundant 'of nature' after 'pictures' or keep concise.

× I prefer views in my own country because my country has a many cultural heritage and nature.

✓ I prefer views in my own country because my country has much cultural heritage and natural beauty.

'A many' is ungrammatical; use 'many' with countable nouns or 'much' with uncountable nouns (Error type 14). 'Cultural heritage' is generally uncountable; 'much cultural heritage' or 'many cultural sites' are possible. Also 'and nature' is vague; 'and natural beauty' is clearer.

× Places like Taj Mahal, Mount Abu Hills station are also available there so it is very quiet to.

✓ Places like the Taj Mahal and Mount Abu Hill station are also there, so it is very quiet.

Use the definite article with well-known monuments: 'the Taj Mahal' (Error type 17/22). 'Mount Abu Hills station' wording is awkward; 'Mount Abu Hill station' or 'the Mount Abu railway station' depending on meaning—here 'Mount Abu Hill station' was used. The phrase 'are also available there' is unnatural for places—use 'are also there'. 'So it is very quiet to' is ungrammatical; use 'so it is very quiet' (remove trailing 'to').