Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and clear. Start with a direct topic sentence answering the question, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler words and unclear phrases.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. For example, I often photograph sunsets and rivers because they create peaceful feelings and help me relax.

提案: State your preference directly, then explain why with specific reasons and a linking word. Use correct vocabulary (urban/rural) and avoid repeating words or mispronunciations.

例: I prefer rural views rather than urban ones because the countryside has natural scenery, quiet surroundings, and fresh air, which help me feel calm.

提案: Answer directly and give clear reasons with specific details. Use linking words such as 'because' or 'while' and avoid repetition and hesitations. If you haven't visited other countries, mention that briefly.

例: I prefer views in my own country because its landscapes, especially the mountains, are very beautiful and peaceful. I have not travelled abroad, so I cannot compare directly.

× Yes, of course I like taking pictures of different views like I don't I. Which keep you peaceful vibes.

✓ Yes, of course I like taking pictures of different views because they give me peaceful vibes.

The original contains sentence fragments and unclear phrasing ('I don't I.' and 'Which keep you peaceful vibes'). This is a sentence structure error (ID 26). Combine ideas into one clear sentence using a conjunction ('because') and correct verb agreement ('give me' for plural 'views'). Use 'peaceful vibes' as a noun phrase; do not use 'you' when referring to the speaker's feeling unless intended. Suggestion: form complete sentences with a subject and verb and avoid fragments.

× I I will prefer beers urban areas like Indian bees are like give you our natural and calm peaceful vibes, feelings and that is very good and I like that bike so much.

✓ I prefer urban areas; Indian cities give natural and calm, peaceful vibes, and I like that a lot.

This sentence has incorrect tense and many word choices. Saying 'I will prefer' is unnecessary for a general preference; use simple present 'I prefer' (ID 6). There are also incorrect words ('beers', 'bees', 'bike') that appear to be misused; replace with 'cities' and correct noun usage. Use semicolon or short sentences to improve clarity. Keep verb agreement: 'cities give'. Avoid redundancy ('vibes, feelings').

× I prefer views in your own country or in other countries? Uh definitely I would prefer my own countries like umm our countries naturally beautiful like I like our countrymen and mountains There there there vibes are literally peaceful.

✓ Definitely I would prefer my own country because our country is naturally beautiful; I like the people and mountains; their vibes are very peaceful.

The original mixes singular and plural inconsistently ('my own countries', 'our countries', 'countrymen'). Use singular 'my own country' when referring to a single nation (ID 1). Also correct noun forms: 'countrymen' is acceptable but 'people' is more natural. Use 'its/their vibes' to match the plural noun 'people and mountains' or rephrase to 'the country is... and its vibe is...'. Remove filler and repetitions. Ensure agreement between nouns and verbs.

× Then I think other countries I never visit other countries.

✓ I have never visited other countries.

The student tries to express lack of past experience but uses incorrect tense and redundancy. The correct form is present perfect 'I have never visited other countries' to indicate life experience (ID 5). Also remove repeated phrase. Use auxiliary 'have' plus past participle 'visited'.