Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is natural and directly addresses the question with a clear reason, but it includes a slight redundancy (“aesthetically pleasing to my eyes” + “can't help but”) and could be tightened. Also add one specific example to make it more vivid. Keep it within 3–4 sentences and use a linking word when adding the example.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views, especially while travelling. For example, when I visited a seaside town last year, I photographed the sunset over the pier because the colours and reflections were striking. I often capture scenes that have interesting light or composition because they make better photos.

提案: The response answers the question but is hesitative and vague with filler words and repetition. Improve fluency by removing fillers, giving a concise topic sentence, and then adding one specific contrast with a linking word (e.g., "however" or "for example"). Aim for clearer vocabulary (e.g., "features" instead of "points or elements").

例: I don't have a strong preference between urban and rural views. However, urban areas appeal to me for their architecture and vibrant street scenes, whereas rural areas attract me because of peaceful landscapes and natural colours.

提案: The answer gives relevant information but is incomplete and ends abruptly. Improve by starting with a clear preference statement, then support it with specific examples and reasons, and finish the thought. Avoid short fragments and check grammar (e.g., "I usually find" not "found").

例: I prefer the views I see in other countries because I notice more striking differences in architecture and street life. For example, when I visited Singapore and Hong Kong I was impressed by the skyline and colourful markets, which I don’t often find in my hometown cafes.

× I like taking pictures of different views, especially when I travel outside.

✓ I like taking pictures of different views, especially when I travel abroad.

Using 'travel outside' is unnatural; 'travel abroad' or 'travel outside the city/country' is correct. The issue relates to verb + -ing usage context and idiomatic preposition choice. Use 'abroad' or specify 'outside the country' for clarity.

× When I see something aesthetically pleasing to my eyes, I can't help but get my phone and capture a photo.

✓ When I see something aesthetically pleasing, I can't help but take out my phone and take a photo.

Phrase 'aesthetically pleasing to my eyes' is wordy and redundant; 'aesthetically pleasing' suffices. 'Get my phone and capture a photo' is awkward — use the common collocations 'take out my phone' and 'take a photo'. This is a verb + -ing/contextual collocation correction.

× I would say I don't have a preference for either urban or rural areas.

✓ I would say I don't have a preference for either urban or rural areas.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no change needed. Included for completeness.

× I like them both because both areas have points of umm uh, points or elements that I usually like.

✓ I like both because each has features or elements that I usually like.

Redundant 'both' twice and filler words 'umm uh' should be removed. 'Points' is vague; 'features or elements' is clearer. This improves sentence structure and word choice.

× I haven't traveled that much in my country, I only go to cafes I find cute, so I would say I like the views I see in those cafes or restaurants.

✓ I haven't traveled much within my country; I usually just go to cafes I find cute, so I would say I like the views I see in those cafes or restaurants.

Use 'within my country' for clarity and a semicolon to separate clauses. 'I only go' sounds odd with present perfect; 'I usually just go' matches habitual present. This addresses tense consistency and preposition choice.

× But I usually found many things I like when I travel in other countries, such as when I visited Singapore and Hong Kong.

✓ But I usually find many things I like when I travel to other countries, for example when I visited Singapore and Hong Kong.

Tense inconsistency: 'usually found' mixes past with habitual meaning; use present 'usually find'. Use 'travel to other countries' rather than 'travel in'. Keep past 'visited' for the specific trip. This corrects tense and preposition usage.

× I like the.

✓ I like the views there.

The original is an incomplete sentence missing an object. Complete it to 'I like the views there' to match context. This fixes sentence structure and omission of necessary noun.