Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clear, concise and natural. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid unclear words and irrelevant phrases. Use linking words (for example, “because” or “so”) to connect ideas and be careful with vocabulary (e.g., use “take photos” not “took pizza”).

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views. I have loved photography since childhood, and I often take pictures when I travel to capture memories. For example, last month I photographed the sunset over a lake, which helped me remember the peaceful atmosphere.

提案: Give a clear direct answer and follow with one or two specific reasons. Use correct vocabulary (e.g., “urban” and “rural”) and avoid unintelligible phrases. Use linking words like “because” and “so” to make your reasons coherent. Keep sentences short and natural.

例: I prefer views in rural areas because cities near me are often polluted. In the countryside I can see mountains and waterfalls, which are calmer and more scenic, so I usually choose rural locations for photography.

提案: Respond directly and give balanced, specific reasons. Use correct grammar (e.g., “my country has a lot of scenery”) and reduce filler words like “uh.” Mention one or two concrete examples or comparisons. Use linking phrases such as “however” or “also” to compare.

例: I like views in both my country and abroad. My country has many mountains and waterfalls that I enjoy, but I would also love to visit Switzerland because it is famous for its dramatic mountains and green landscapes. For instance, the Swiss Alps are a major attraction for photographers.

× I used to drag in three charts since my childhood and it is one of my favorite hobbies.

✓ I have been taking photos since my childhood and it is one of my favorite hobbies.

This sentence contains incorrect verbs and phrase choices not in the provided list but most closely match sentence structure and verb tense errors (Present perfect vs incorrect 'used to drag in'). Use present perfect 'have been taking' to show an action continuing from the past to the present. 'Taking photos' is the correct collocation; 'drag in three charts' is incorrect and unclear. Suggestion: use correct collocations (take photos) and present perfect for experiences continuing to now.

× Also even I visit in somewhere.

✓ Also, even when I visit somewhere,

This is a sentence structure and preposition issue. The student omitted the conjunction 'when' and used unnecessary preposition 'in'. Use 'when I visit somewhere' to express the time clause. Add commas for clarity.

× This time I mostly took pizza for taking memories.

✓ This time I mostly took pictures to remember it.

The student used 'took pizza' incorrectly—likely meant 'took pictures'. 'For taking memories' is unidiomatic; use 'to remember it' or 'to keep memories'. Correct verb 'take pictures' and purpose infinitive 'to remember'.

× Well, Almali divorced to abuse a roller area, it would not be that.

✓ Well, I meant to say I prefer rural areas, not urban ones.

The original is unintelligible with wrong words ('Almali divorced to abuse a roller area'). This is a sentence structure and word choice problem. Rephrase to clear meaning: 'I prefer rural areas, not urban ones.' Ensure coherence and correct vocabulary ('rural', 'urban').

× I live in a country where most of the city are surrounded by pollution and in the rural areas I can find natural mountains or even the waterfalls.

✓ I live in a country where most of the cities are surrounded by pollution, and in the rural areas I can find natural mountains and waterfalls.

Error: subject-verb agreement ('most of the city are' should be 'most of the cities are'). Also article misuse: 'the waterfalls' is unnecessary; use plural 'waterfalls' without 'the'. Use commas and conjunction 'and' for clarity.

× So it is uh, more preferable.

✓ So they are, uh, more appealing to me.

'More preferable' is awkward; 'preferable' already indicates preference. Use 'more appealing to me' or 'preferable' with a clear subject. Adjust pronoun agreement ('they' referring to rural areas) and word choice.

× Yeah, I prefer both countries because my country available lot of scenery including mountains, waterfall and other natural, but I also prefer to visit Switzerland.

✓ Yeah, I like both, because my country has a lot of scenery including mountains and waterfalls, but I would also like to visit Switzerland.

Multiple errors: missing verb 'has' (sentence without a verb/verb usage), article/quantifier 'a lot of' needed, plural 'waterfalls', and 'other natural' is incomplete — use 'other natural scenery'. Also 'prefer both countries' is odd; 'like both' or 'I prefer both' needs objects clarified. Use 'would like to visit' for desire to go in the future.

× Do you know that, uh, it is a very famous for several mountains, uh, waterfall and the green sceneries.

✓ Do you know that it is very famous for its mountains, waterfalls, and green scenery?

Errors: unnecessary article 'a' with 'very famous', incorrect preposition and noun forms ('several mountains, waterfall' should be 'mountains, waterfalls'), and 'the green sceneries' is unidiomatic—use 'green scenery' or 'green landscapes'. Also add possessive 'its' to refer to Switzerland. Use question mark intonation if asking.