Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more natural and concise, correct grammar and reduce fillers. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific example with correct verb tenses and prepositions. Use linking words like “for example” and avoid repeating words.

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. For example, when I lived in Italy I loved the sea views, so whenever I went to the seaside I often took photos of the coastline and fishing boats.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and expand with specific reasons and a linking word. Fix subject-verb agreement and avoid fillers. Limit answer to up to five sentences and add a brief comparison.

例: I prefer rural areas because they offer more natural scenery. For example, countryside views often include rolling hills and open fields, whereas urban landscapes tend to be crowded and noisy.

提案: Be more specific and concise. Use varied vocabulary (e.g., architecture, landmarks) and avoid repeating phrases like “in other countries.” Add a linking phrase and give one concrete example of a place or style.

例: I generally prefer views in other countries because the architecture and historic landmarks are often more varied. For instance, when I visited Prague I was fascinated by the Gothic and Baroque buildings, which are quite different from those in my country.

× I was living on Italia and I really liked sea views, so when we went to seaside of our city, I always took picture of it.

✓ I was living in Italy and I really liked sea views, so when we went to the seaside of our city, I always took pictures of them.

Preposition and noun form errors: use 'in' for countries not 'on', and the correct English name is 'Italy' not 'Italia'. 'Seaside' needs the definite article 'the' when referring to a specific seaside. 'Took picture' is singular but context requires plural 'took pictures'. Also refer back to 'sea views' with 'them' rather than 'it'. Suggestion: use 'in' with country names, include 'the' for specific places like 'the seaside', pluralize countable nouns, and match pronouns to plural antecedents.

× I prefer rural areas because, uh, it has really good views, uh, when you compare to urban areas.

✓ I prefer rural areas because they have really good views when you compare them to urban areas.

Subject-verb agreement and pronoun reference: 'rural areas' is plural so use 'they have' not 'it has'. Also when making comparisons use 'compare X to Y' with an explicit object: 'compare them to urban areas'. Suggestion: match verb number to the subject and make comparison objects explicit.

× I prefer rural areas because, uh, it has really good views, uh, when you compare to urban areas.

✓ I prefer rural areas because they have really good views when you compare them to urban areas.

Preposition usage in comparisons: 'compare to' requires a subject being compared; say 'compare them to urban areas' or 'compared with urban areas'. Suggestion: include the thing being compared ('them') or use 'compared with' for clarity.

× I generally prefer views in other countries because in other countries I see lots of different structures of buildings and they are more historical than my country.

✓ I generally prefer views in other countries because I see many different building styles there, and they are more historic than those in my country.

Awkward structure and incorrect comparison: 'structures of buildings' is unnatural — use 'building styles' or 'types of buildings'. Repetition of 'in other countries' is unnecessary; use 'there'. 'More historical than my country' compares plural 'they' to singular 'my country' which is incorrect. Use 'those in my country' for correct comparison and 'historic' is a more natural adjective. Suggestion: simplify sentences, avoid repetition, use parallel and clear comparison targets.