Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct grammar (e.g., verb forms, articles) and avoid repetition like "taking pictures" multiple times.

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. For example, when I go out with friends and the weather is nice, I often take photos of landscapes and interesting scenes to remember the day.

提案: Answer directly then add a specific reason with linking words. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., "rural" or "countryside") and correct minor grammar ("older areas" is unclear).

例: I prefer rural views because I dislike crowded, traffic-heavy streets. For instance, I usually photograph trees, fields and quiet lanes since they look more peaceful and natural.

提案: Be clear and structured: give a direct preference, then one or two specific examples or reasons. Avoid filler words and repetition. Improve grammar and word choice (e.g., "prefer views in other countries", "Switzerland has beautiful landscapes").

例: I prefer views in other countries because they often offer landscapes I can't find at home. For example, Switzerland's mountains, forests and waterfalls are famous for their dramatic scenery and are very inspiring to photograph.

× Yes, I like taking pictures of different views, my memories or phone memories almost full of taking pictures.

✓ Yes, I like taking pictures of different views; my phone memory is almost full because I take so many photos.

The original sentence is a run-on with unclear structure and missing verb agreement. It combines two ideas without proper punctuation and uses 'my memories or phone memories almost full of taking pictures' which is ungrammatical. Use a semicolon or period to separate independent clauses, use 'phone memory is almost full' for subject-verb agreement, and add 'because' or a clause to explain the reason. Keep sentence concise and clear.

× When I am go with my friends to outside and see any landscape and beautiful weather I often take pictures.

✓ When I go out with my friends and see a nice landscape or good weather, I often take pictures.

The phrase 'When I am go' incorrectly mixes auxiliary 'am' with base verb 'go'; use the simple present 'go' for habitual actions. 'To outside' is incorrect preposition use; use 'go out'. 'See any landscape and beautiful weather' is awkward; use 'see a nice landscape or good weather'. Place commas to separate the subordinate clause. This keeps tense consistent for habitual actions.

× I prefer to take pictures in older areas because I do not like congested and traffic areas, so I always prefer to take pictures of trees and nature.

✓ I prefer taking pictures in older areas because I do not like congested, traffic-heavy places, so I usually photograph trees and nature.

'Congested and traffic areas' is awkward; use 'congested, traffic-heavy places' to modify the noun correctly. Use 'prefer taking' or 'prefer to take' consistently. Repetition of 'prefer' can be reduced; use 'usually photograph' for variety. This improves adjective order and word choice.

× So I love to travel and for and here I am say that I can prefer news from other countries because like there are many countries which are very famous for their nature nature beauty.

✓ I love to travel, and I prefer views from other countries because many of them are famous for their natural beauty.

The original sentence contains extraneous words ('for and here I am say') and redundancy ('nature nature beauty'). It lacks clear structure. Simplify to 'I love to travel, and I prefer views from other countries' and use 'natural beauty' as the correct noun phrase. This fixes sentence structure and redundancy.

× Like Switzerland is a lot of trees and waterfalls, natural waterfalls which in interact the person.

✓ For example, Switzerland has many trees and natural waterfalls that attract people.

'Like Switzerland is a lot of trees' is ungrammatical; use 'Switzerland has many trees'. 'Natural waterfalls which in interact the person' is incorrect phrasing; use 'that attract people' to express purpose. Replace 'like' with 'for example' or 'such as' to introduce examples. This corrects verb usage and clarifies the meaning.