Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid redundant or unclear phrases (e.g., “gives me a wife”). Also correct verb forms and countable/uncountable nouns.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views. For example, I often photograph landscapes and cityscapes and then post my best shots on social media, which helps me share memories with friends. Also, reviewing these photos later relaxes me and boosts my mood.

提案: Begin with a direct statement and correct grammar (past tense and word choice). Use specific vocabulary (serene, farmland, woodlands) and a linking word to add a reason. Avoid vague phrases like “all that stuff” and mispronounced words in writing like “rulers.”

例: I prefer rural views because I grew up in the countryside. For instance, I like wide fields, woodlands and small farms, which feel peaceful and less crowded than urban streets.

提案: Answer directly and finish the thought. Use clear comparisons and specific examples. Correct grammar (e.g., ‘born and brought up’ → ‘born and raised’) and avoid incomplete sentences. Use a linking word (however/also) when contrasting.

例: I enjoy views in both my country and abroad because each place is unique. For example, at home I love rural scenery like rolling hills and rice paddies, while abroad I enjoy coastal or mountain landscapes that look very different from what I know.

× I just love to go back and explore those pictures that are captured by me because they gives me a wife to boost up my energy and help me to relax.

✓ I just love to go back and explore those pictures that were captured by me because they give me a way to boost my energy and help me relax.

Use past participle with appropriate auxiliary for passive: 'were captured' (past passive) fits the context. 'gives' is incorrect subject-verb agreement with plural 'they' so use 'give' (See type 27 too). 'a wife' is a wrong word; intended 'a way'. 'boost up' is redundant; 'boost' is preferred. 'help me to relax' -> 'help me relax' is more natural. Suggested improvement: Use 'were captured' for passive past, match verb to plural subject 'they give', choose correct noun 'way', and simplify 'help me relax'.

× they gives me a wife to boost up my energy and help me to relax.

✓ they give me a way to boost my energy and help me relax.

The subject 'they' is plural and requires the base verb 'give' not 'gives'. 'a wife' is a wrong lexical choice; 'a way' conveys the intended meaning. 'boost up' is less natural than 'boost'. 'help me to relax' can be simplified to 'help me relax'. Suggested improvement: Always match verb form to the subject number and choose appropriate vocabulary.

× I love to take the pictures of different views and after that I post them on my social media and even sometimes I feel stressed.

✓ I love to take pictures of different views and after that I post them on my social media; sometimes I even feel stressed.

'Take the pictures' implies specific pictures; general statement about taking photos uses no article: 'take pictures'. Word order 'sometimes I even' sounds more natural. Also use a semicolon or split into two sentences for clarity. Suggested improvement: Omit the definite article for general activities and place adverbs ('even', 'sometimes') in natural positions.

× those pictures that are captured by me

✓ those pictures that were captured by me

Use appropriate tense and passive construction: 'were captured by me' is past passive and matches the implied time. 'that are captured by me' suggests present continuous passive, which doesn't fit here. Suggested improvement: Use past passive 'were captured' when referring to photos already taken.

× I prefer the views in the rural areas because I born and brought up in the rural area where we have very serene views of the nature such as fields and the words and different farms and all that stuff.

✓ I prefer views in rural areas because I was born and brought up in a rural area where we have very serene natural scenery such as fields, woods, and various farms.

Remove unnecessary 'the' before plural general nouns: 'views in rural areas' not 'the rural areas'. 'I born and brought up' is missing auxiliary 'was'. 'the nature' is incorrect; use 'natural scenery' or 'nature'. 'the words' is a typo for 'woods'. Also use 'various farms' instead of 'different farms' for fluency. Suggested improvement: Include correct auxiliary verbs, correct plural nouns, and fix typos; use 'was born and brought up' for past passive.

× because I born and brought up in the rural area

✓ because I was born and brought up in the rural area

The verb 'born' requires the auxiliary 'was' in the passive voice to form past tense: 'was born'. 'brought up' also needs the auxiliary 'was' (or use 'I was born and brought up'). Suggested improvement: Use 'I was born and brought up' when referring to past passive events.

× So I always prefer rulers over the urban areas because urban areas too crowded.

✓ So I always prefer rural areas over urban areas because urban areas are too crowded.

'rulers' is incorrect word; it should be 'rural areas'. Missing verb 'are' in 'urban areas too crowded' makes the sentence ungrammatical; include 'are'. Suggested improvement: Check word choice and ensure the verb 'to be' is present when needed.

× I prefer the views in both my own country and the other countries because every country has its own beauty.

✓ I prefer views in both my own country and other countries because every country has its own beauty.

Omit 'the' before general plural 'other countries'. 'the other countries' implies a specific set; 'other countries' is the general meaning. Suggested improvement: Avoid unnecessary definite articles with general plural nouns.

× So in my country I love to have the views in the rural areas as I brought born and brought up in the countryside because the scenery is the rain in countryside areas but on the other hand, I.

✓ So in my country I love rural views because I was born and brought up in the countryside; the scenery in rural areas is beautiful, but on the other hand I...

This sentence has multiple errors: 'brought born' is incorrect order and missing 'was'; 'the scenery is the rain' is meaningless—likely intended 'the scenery in countryside areas is beautiful'. The sentence is also incomplete. Reorder and correct verbs, remove redundant articles, and complete the thought. Suggested improvement: Use 'I was born and brought up', describe scenery with clear adjectives (e.g., 'beautiful'), and finish the sentence or split into two for clarity.