Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答总体自然，但有些句子冗长且信息堆积，影响清晰度。注意控制句子长度（不超过5句），使用更连贯的衔接词并加入具体细节以增强描述。例如可以把原因与具体拍摄对象分成两句，并举一两个具体场景或情感体验。

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. I always carry a small digital camera when I travel because I like to capture special moments. For example, I often shoot mountain sunrises and city nightscapes, which help me relax and remember the trip.

提案: 回答含义不够清晰，有语义矛盾（如同时说“tranquil”和“crowded”）和句子不完整（最后一句未说清感受）。应避免自相矛盾，使用明确对比并补全未说完的句子。提供具体细节（例如声音、空气、可拍摄的对象）并用连接词组织观点。

例: I prefer rural views because the countryside is tranquil and has fewer cars, which makes it easier to relax and notice small details like the colours of a sunset or the texture of fields. In contrast, cities are lively but the constant traffic noise can be distracting when I want to photograph peaceful scenes.

提案: 回答思路清晰但有用词不当（如"computing"用错）且可更具体。应用更恰当的动词（e.g. "contrast"或"compare"），并给出一两个具体国家或建筑类型作为例子，使表达更有说服力。

例: I prefer views in other countries because travel allows me to see different cultures and landscapes. For instance, I like photographing ancient temples in Japan and contrasting them with the modern skyscrapers I capture in my own city.

× I prefer the countryside because it offers tranquil, light, crowded scenes with fewer vehicles, which helps me relax and focus on some details like feels and sunsets.

✓ I prefer the countryside because it offers tranquil, quiet scenes with fewer vehicles, which helps me relax and focus on details like the feel of the place and sunsets.

原句中“tranquil, light, crowded scenes”几个形容词并列使用且含义矛盾（tranquil 平静，crowded 拥挤），另“light”在此语境下不恰当。应选择与“tranquil”一致的形容词如“quiet”。另外“some details like feels and sunsets”中的“feels”用法不当，名词应为“the feel”或“the atmosphere/feeling”。改为“focus on details like the feel of the place and sunsets”更自然。建议：选择语义一致的形容词并使用正确的名词形式来表达抽象感受。

× While cities can be vibrant, their noise and traffic often make me feel.

✓ While cities can be vibrant, their noise and traffic often make me feel stressed or uncomfortable.

原句“make me feel”后面缺少补足语（情绪或感受），句子不完整。需要跟上形容词或名词短语来说明具体感觉，如“stressed”或“uncomfortable”。建议：写作时注意使役动词或感官动词后的宾语补足语完整，保证句子结构完整。

× For example, I enjoy photographing ancient architecture abroad and computing it with modern buildings in my country.

✓ For example, I enjoy photographing ancient architecture abroad and comparing it with modern buildings in my country.

原句中使用“computing”显然不符合语境，应为“comparing”（比较）。这是词汇选择导致的句子结构和语义错误。建议：根据上下文选择恰当动词（这里表示“比较”用 compare），并注意并列结构的一致性。

× I usually bring a small digital camera when I travel because I like to capture special moments and beautiful landscapes such as a mountain or sunrise or a city's nightlife, which I find very therapeutic.

✓ I usually bring a small digital camera when I travel because I like to capture special moments and beautiful landscapes such as mountains, sunrises, or a city's nightlife, which I find very therapeutic.

原句中“such as a mountain or sunrise or a city's nightlife”在列举可数名词时单复数不一致，应统一为复数形式（mountains, sunrises）或保持一致的表达。此外“a city's nightlife”可以保留单数特指一种夜生活，但与前两项并列时形式最好统一。建议：并列名词时注意数的一致性，列举项用逗号分隔并使用并列连词。