Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler sounds (uh, um) and redundant phrases. Correct verb forms (e.g., “I have become interested in taking different kinds of photos”) and plural/singular agreement.

例: Yes. I have become interested in taking different kinds of photos because landscapes like mountains, lakes and sunrise scenes give me great satisfaction. For example, I often photograph a sunrise at the lake to capture peaceful light and vivid colors.

提案: Answer directly which you prefer (or say both) and then explain briefly with clear linking words and correct grammar. Use specific examples and avoid repetition. Use correct verb forms and noun phrases (e.g., “skyscrapers” not “tall building”).

例: I enjoy both, but my preference depends on the situation. For instance, in the city I like shooting skyscrapers and nighttime street scenes because of the lights; whereas when I go hiking I prefer photographing rural landscapes like forests and mountains for their natural beauty.

提案: Give a clear direct answer (e.g., “I like views in both my country and abroad”) then support with one specific reason for each. Remove hesitations and finish your sentences. Use linking words like “however” or “for example” to organize ideas.

例: I like views in both my country and abroad because each offers different advantages. For example, at home I often photograph familiar city bridges and historic buildings, while when I travel I enjoy capturing unfamiliar skylines and cultural scenes that offer new perspectives.

× Yes, I have gained interest to taking the different kind of pictures uh, for different views, uh, like uh, when I saw beautiful mountain, uh, sunshine and lakes because it gives me great satisfaction.

✓ Yes, I have gained an interest in taking different kinds of pictures of various views, for example when I see a beautiful mountain, sunshine, or lake, because it gives me great satisfaction.

The phrase 'interest to taking' is incorrect; use 'interest in taking' (preposition usage and gerund form). 'Different kind' should be plural 'different kinds' to agree with plural noun 'pictures' (singular and plural issue). 'Of various views' is more natural than 'for different views'. Use 'when I see' (present simple) for general habits instead of 'when I saw' (past tense). Also add articles: 'a beautiful mountain' and 'a lake'. Improve clarity by listing examples with commas.

× Moreover, I like to take in pictures when I saw beautiful moments.

✓ Moreover, I like to take pictures when I see beautiful moments.

Use base verb 'take' with object 'pictures' (remove extra 'in'). 'When I saw' is past tense; for habitual actions use present simple 'when I see' (present tense issue). This correction removes incorrect preposition and fixes tense.

× When it depends on a situation like when I, when I am in motor series, umm, over there I saw a lot of tall building and sometimes I captures that pictures like in night time it uh, has a beautiful view.

✓ It depends on the situation. For example, when I am in a motorcade/on a bus, I see a lot of tall buildings and sometimes I capture pictures of them at night because they have a beautiful view.

Original sentence is run-on and unclear. 'When it depends on a situation' is ungrammatical; use 'It depends on the situation'. 'Motor series' is unclear; likely 'motorcade' or 'on a bus'. 'A lot of tall building' needs plural 'buildings' (singular and plural issue). 'I captures' should be 'I capture' (subject-verb agreement / third person singular issue). 'That pictures' should be 'those pictures' or 'pictures of them' (incorrect use of demonstrative/quantifier). 'In night time' -> 'at night' (preposition usage). 'It has a beautiful view' -> 'they have a beautiful view' to agree with plural buildings.

× Apart from the when I go for hiking or something at that time I uh, capture rural area pictures.

✓ When I go hiking or do similar activities, I capture pictures of rural areas.

'Apart from the when' is incorrect; simplify to 'When I go hiking'. Use 'go hiking' (correct verb + -ing form). 'Capture rural area pictures' is awkward; use 'capture pictures of rural areas'. Maintain present simple for habitual actions.

× Well, I like views, uh, both places places it's depend on situation.

✓ Well, I like views in both places; it depends on the situation.

'Both places places' duplicates a word and is ungrammatical. Use 'views in both places'. 'It's depend' must be 'it depends' (subject-verb agreement / present tense issue). Split into two clauses for clarity.

× When I am in cities and, uh, I'm sitting on a bridge and at that time I capture a tall building pictures apart from the that at night time, uh, when I see lighting at that, at the moment, I capture that pictures, uh, moreover in.

✓ When I am in cities and sitting on a bridge, I take pictures of tall buildings. Also, at night when I see the lights, I capture those pictures.

Use 'take pictures' or 'capture pictures of' with correct object order. 'A tall building pictures' is incorrect; use 'pictures of tall buildings' (article and plural issues). 'At night time' -> 'at night'. 'When I see lighting at that, at the moment' is redundant and unclear; simplify to 'when I see the lights'. 'Capture that pictures' should be 'capture those pictures' or better 'take those pictures' (pronoun/quantifier and agreement). Removed trailing 'moreover in' which is incomplete (sentence structure error).