List— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains some grammatical errors. Try to give a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, then add specific reasons with linking words. Avoid filler words and incomplete sentences to make your answer more natural and effective.

例: Yes, I always make a list when I shop because it helps me save time and avoid distractions from my phone or music. For example, having a list keeps me focused on what I need to buy and prevents me from forgetting important items.

提案: Your answer is quite repetitive and unclear due to many fillers and incomplete sentences. Try to structure your response with a clear topic sentence, followed by specific details using linking words. Also, avoid hesitation sounds like 'umm' to sound more fluent.

例: Yes, I use a diary to organise my work week. By writing down my priorities and daily tasks, I can track my responsibilities effectively. This method helps me improve my productivity and stay on top of my roles.

提案: Your answer shows good ideas but lacks clarity and contains grammatical mistakes. Try to express your opinion clearly with correct sentence structures and use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: Some people dislike making lists because they prefer to be spontaneous rather than organised. Everyone has their own way of doing things, and for some, lists might feel restrictive, which is why it doesn't work for them.

提案: Your answer is relevant but could be more concise and fluent. Avoid hesitation sounds and try to use linking words to compare your preferences clearly. Also, use more precise vocabulary to express your ideas naturally.

例: It depends on the situation. For shopping lists, I prefer using my phone because it's convenient and I don't have to carry paper. However, for work-related notes, I like using my diary to avoid distractions from my phone.

× Yes I do. I am. I consider myself an organized person and I think if I have at least I will save time while I am shopping.

✓ Yes, I do. I consider myself an organised person and I think if I have a list, at least I will save time while I am shopping.

The original sentence contains incomplete and fragmented parts such as 'I am' and 'if I have at least' which lack clarity and proper structure. Adding 'a list' after 'if I have' completes the thought. Also, 'organised' is the Australian English spelling. Proper sentence structure improves clarity and coherence.

× I think like nowadays we get distracted easily with our phones and musics and I don't know people around us so it's a good way to organize our stuff.

✓ I think nowadays we get distracted easily by our phones and music, and I don't know, people around us, so it's a good way to organise our stuff.

The phrase 'distracted easily with' should be 'distracted easily by' to correctly indicate the cause of distraction. Also, 'musics' is incorrect as 'music' is an uncountable noun. Adding commas improves readability.

× I have my diary in where I'd like to organize my week umm, and of course in where I do when I write down all the priorities umm, I like to take what I do during the day umm,

✓ I have my diary where I'd like to organise my week, and of course where I write down all the priorities. I like to note what I do during the day.

The phrase 'in where' is incorrect; 'where' alone suffices to indicate location. Also, 'take what I do' is unclear; 'note what I do' is more appropriate. Removing filler words and restructuring improves clarity.

× In this way I can track all the roles that I have for the week umm, that help me to improve my.

✓ In this way, I can track all the roles that I have for the week, which helps me to improve myself.

The word 'roles' is correct plural, but the verb should agree with the singular subject 'which' referring to 'tracking'. Also, the sentence ends abruptly; adding 'myself' completes the thought. Proper subject-verb agreement and sentence completion are necessary.

× I don't know, it's something that you should ask to them, but I think at least it's a 'cause they like to be more spontaneous in what they do instead to have like an organised life.

✓ I don't know, it's something that you should ask them, but I think it's because they like to be more spontaneous in what they do instead of having an organised life.

The phrase 'ask to them' is incorrect; it should be 'ask them'. Also, 'instead to have' should be 'instead of having' to correctly express contrast. These prepositional corrections improve grammatical accuracy.

× Everyone is different, everyone has different way to be.

✓ Everyone is different; everyone has a different way of being.

The phrase 'different way' requires an article 'a' before it. Also, 'way to be' is better expressed as 'way of being' for natural English usage. Correct article use and idiomatic expression improve the sentence.

× I don't think that is bad thing is just something that it doesn't work for me.

✓ I don't think that is a bad thing; it's just something that doesn't work for me.

The original sentence is a run-on and lacks articles. Adding 'a' before 'bad thing' and separating the ideas with a semicolon clarifies meaning and improves sentence structure.

× If it's, I don't know my supermarket list or shopping list, I prefer to do it on my phone so I don't need to be carrying a paper.

✓ If it's, I don't know, my supermarket list or shopping list, I prefer to do it on my phone so I don't need to carry paper.

The phrase 'be carrying a paper' is awkward; 'carry paper' is more natural. Also, 'a paper' is incorrect here because 'paper' is uncountable in this context. Removing unnecessary articles and correcting verb forms improves the sentence.

× but it's about work. I like to make notes on my diary and don't be distracted with my phone.

✓ But when it's about work, I like to make notes in my diary and not be distracted by my phone.

The correct preposition with 'diary' is 'in' not 'on'. Also, 'distracted with' should be 'distracted by' to indicate the cause of distraction. Changing 'don't be' to 'not be' fits the sentence structure better.