Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to avoid contradictory statements and be more coherent. For example, instead of saying "Yes, I love singing. I don't.", say "Yes, I love singing even though I'm not very good at it." Also, keep your answer concise and clear.

例: Yes, I love singing even though I'm not very good at it because it allows me to express my feelings and energy through songs.

提案: Use clearer linking words and improve sentence structure for better coherence. For example, use "Although I haven't learned singing professionally, I have tried to improve my musical skills by self-learning and playing musical instruments, which I believe helped my singing abilities."

例: Although I haven't learned singing professionally, I have tried to improve my musical skills by self-learning and playing musical instruments, which I believe helped my singing abilities.

提案: Try to avoid filler words like "umm" and use linking words to connect ideas smoothly. For example, "I usually sing for myself because I'm not very good at it, and I don't like singing in public. However, sometimes I sing with friends for fun when we hang out."

例: I usually sing for myself because I'm not very good at it, and I don't like singing in public. However, sometimes I sing with friends for fun when we hang out.

提案: Use more precise vocabulary and linking words to improve clarity. For example, "I think singing can evoke various emotions, such as happiness or sadness, depending on the song. Personally, I experience both feelings when I listen to certain songs."

例: I think singing can evoke various emotions, such as happiness or sadness, depending on the song. Personally, I experience both feelings when I listen to certain songs.

× I don't.

✓ I don't like singing.

The sentence 'I don't.' is incomplete and unclear. It lacks the main verb or object after the auxiliary 'do not'. To express dislike, it should be 'I don't like singing.' This clarifies the meaning and completes the sentence structure.

× I tried to expand my musical abilities by self learning.

✓ I tried to expand my musical abilities by self-learning.

The phrase 'self learning' should be hyphenated as 'self-learning' when used as a noun or adjective. This is a compound noun formed by combining 'self' and 'learning' to indicate learning by oneself.

× So I like to pick up musical instruments that I believe helped me to develop my singing abilities.

✓ So I like to pick up musical instruments that I believe have helped me to develop my singing abilities.

The verb tense should be present perfect 'have helped' to indicate an action that started in the past and continues to have relevance now. Using 'helped' alone implies a completed past action without current relevance.

× I don't like to sing in public or in front of other people.

✓ I don't like to sing in public or in front of others.

Using 'others' is more natural and concise than 'other people' in this context. Both are grammatically correct, but 'others' is preferred for smoother expression.

× However, there are some days where I sing with friends because we do it for fun and as a umm an an activity that we like to do when we hang out.

✓ However, there are some days when I sing with friends because we do it for fun and as an activity that we like to do when we hang out.

The word 'where' is incorrect when referring to time; 'when' should be used instead. Also, filler words like 'umm an an' should be removed for clarity and correctness.