Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear and relevant, but it could be more concise and natural. Avoid redundancy such as "singing because it made my mood really fresh" and "a form of expression to express". Also, try to use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly and keep your sentences within 5. For example, you can say "I like singing because it lifts my mood and makes me feel more energetic. Moreover, it helps me express my emotions, whether I'm sad or happy."

例: I like singing because it lifts my mood and makes me feel more energetic. Moreover, it helps me express my emotions, whether I'm feeling sad or happy.

提案: Your answer provides relevant information but has grammatical errors and some redundancy. Use past tense consistently (e.g., "I learned" instead of "I do learn") and avoid repeating phrases like "singing in a singing competition". Also, try to organize your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details linked logically. For example, "Yes, I learned to sing in grade 10 when I prepared for a school singing competition. I took lessons from an instructor and enjoyed learning different songs and techniques."

例: Yes, I learned to sing in grade 10 when I prepared for a school singing competition. I took lessons from an instructor and enjoyed learning different songs and techniques.

提案: Your answer is quite repetitive and unclear in parts. Try to be more direct and concise, avoiding filler words like "uh" and unclear phrases such as "singing for my, any of the Christ or like whatever they say." Also, use linking words to connect your ideas. For example, "I usually sing for myself because it helps me feel refreshed and energetic. I enjoy spending time alone and singing songs that boost my mood."

例: I usually sing for myself because it helps me feel refreshed and energetic. I enjoy spending time alone and singing songs that boost my mood.

提案: Your answer is relevant but incomplete and contains grammatical errors. Try to complete your thoughts and use linking words to make your answer coherent. For example, "Yes, I believe singing brings happiness to people. For instance, when I listen to soft music while studying, it boosts my mood and helps me focus. Therefore, singing or listening to music can improve people's emotions and productivity."

例: Yes, I believe singing brings happiness to people. For instance, when I listen to soft music while studying, it boosts my mood and helps me focus. Therefore, singing or listening to music can improve people's emotions and productivity.

× Yes, I definitely like singing because it made my mood really fresh and made me feel more energetic and productive.

✓ Yes, I definitely like singing because it makes my mood really fresh and makes me feel more energetic and productive.

The sentence mixes present tense ('I definitely like') with past tense ('it made'). To maintain consistency and express a general truth, present tense should be used throughout ('makes' instead of 'made').

× Yes, I do learn when I was in grade 10 and I have to perform a singing in a singing competition in my school.

✓ Yes, I learned when I was in grade 10 and I had to perform a song in a singing competition at my school.

The phrase 'do learn' is incorrect for past action; simple past 'learned' is appropriate. Also, 'perform a singing' is incorrect; 'perform a song' is correct. The preposition 'in' should be 'at' when referring to a location like 'my school.'

× So I have learned a little bit about how to sing with the instructor of a singing instructor.

✓ So I learned a little bit about how to sing with a singing instructor.

The present perfect 'have learned' is less appropriate here than simple past 'learned' because the action is completed in the past. Also, 'instructor of a singing instructor' is redundant and incorrect; 'a singing instructor' suffices.

× So yes, I did learn that in grade 10.

✓ So yes, I did learn that in grade 10.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no correction needed.

× Oh, it's a hard question to answer, but uh, I wanna sing to myself because I really love myself.

✓ Oh, it's a hard question to answer, but uh, I want to sing to myself because I really love myself.

'Wanna' is informal and should be replaced with 'want to' in formal speech or writing.

× I like myself. I give time to myself, so I often sing songs for myself.

✓ I like myself. I give time to myself, so I often sing songs to myself.

The correct preposition with 'sing' when indicating the person who receives the singing is 'to,' not 'for.'

× Uh, the song that made me feel good to feel, uh, me fresh and even feel me more energetic and productive throughout the day.

✓ Uh, the song that makes me feel good, fresh, and even more energetic and productive throughout the day.

The sentence is awkward and uses incorrect verb forms and pronouns. 'Made' should be 'makes' to match present tense. 'Feel me fresh' is incorrect; it should be 'feel fresh.' Also, 'feel me more energetic' is incorrect; it should be 'feel more energetic.'

× So yes, I really love myself and I always sing for my own self instead of uh, singing for my, any of the Christ or like whatever they say.

✓ So yes, I really love myself and I always sing for myself instead of singing for anyone else or whatever they say.

'For my own self' is redundant; 'for myself' suffices. 'Any of the Christ' is unclear and likely incorrect; 'anyone else' is appropriate. The sentence is simplified for clarity.

× So yes, I. Do what I sing for only on myself.

✓ So yes, I only sing for myself.

The original sentence is fragmented and awkward. The corrected sentence is clear and grammatically correct.

× Yes, definitely singing and uh bring happiness to the people.

✓ Yes, definitely singing brings happiness to people.

The verb 'bring' should be 'brings' to agree with singular subject 'singing.' Also, 'the people' is better as 'people' in general statements.

× For instance, for me, it really boost up my mood and make me feel more energetic, more productive uh, whenever I do some work like specially maths, it really helped me to focus on if I listen uh like light and soft music.

✓ For instance, for me, it really boosts my mood and makes me feel more energetic and more productive. Whenever I do some work, especially maths, it really helps me to focus if I listen to light and soft music.

The verbs 'boost' and 'make' need third person singular forms 'boosts' and 'makes' to agree with 'it.' 'Helped' should be 'helps' to maintain present tense. 'Specially' should be 'especially.' The preposition 'on' after 'focus' is incorrect; 'to' is correct. The sentence is split for clarity.