Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear but a bit repetitive and slightly unnatural. Avoid repeating the question and the word 'sing' multiple times. Try to give a concise reason and use linking words to improve flow.

例: No, I don't enjoy singing because my Christian faith discourages it. Therefore, I prefer to engage in other activities that align with my beliefs.

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and informal. Avoid filler phrases like 'I see' and 'you know'. Provide a direct answer and clarify your experience with singing using linking words.

例: Yes, I have learned to sing religious songs that praise God, but I have not received formal singing lessons beyond that.

提案: Your answer is confusing and contains grammatical errors. Avoid unrelated expressions like 'I was upset'. Clearly state your intention and use correct grammar.

例: I would like to sing only for God because of my religious beliefs.

提案: Your answer is relevant and mostly clear but could be more concise and natural. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and avoid redundancy.

例: Yes, singing, especially hymns, helps people connect with God and others, which often brings happiness.

× Do you like singing? No, I don't like singing because I'm a religious person.

✓ No, I don't like singing because I'm a religious person.

The original sentence repeats the examiner's question unnecessarily. Removing the repeated question makes the sentence clearer and grammatically correct.

× I'm a person of faith and the religion I follow, Christianity, discourages such acts, so I prefer to do other things than sing or sing a whole.

✓ I'm a person of faith, and the religion I follow, Christianity, discourages such acts, so I prefer to do other things rather than sing or sing at all.

The phrase 'prefer to do other things than sing or sing a whole' is awkward and incorrect. Using 'rather than' is the correct conjunction for preference, and 'sing at all' is a clearer expression than 'sing a whole'.

× Yes, I see. I do sing all these songs, you know, sing songs that praise God, but apart from that I do not sing.

✓ Yes, I do. I sing songs that praise God, but apart from that, I do not sing.

'I see' is incorrect in this context; 'I do' is the correct response to 'Have you ever learnt how to sing?'. Also, 'I do sing all these songs' is awkward; simplifying to 'I sing songs that praise God' is clearer. Adding commas improves readability.

× I was upset. I would like to sing for God and Him only because I'm a religion.

✓ I would like to sing for God and Him only because I'm a religious person.

The phrase 'I was upset' is irrelevant and confusing here. Also, 'because I'm a religion' is incorrect; it should be 'because I'm a religious person' to correctly express the reason.

× Yes, if we are talking about singing to our Lord, I think it helps us connect with God and it helps us connect with people around us. And that's the thing that brings happiness to most.

✓ Yes, if we are talking about singing to our Lord, I think it helps us connect with God and with the people around us. And that's what brings happiness to most people.

The phrase 'connect with people around us' is better with 'with the people around us' for clarity. 'That's the thing that brings happiness to most' is incomplete; adding 'people' clarifies the meaning.