Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer dey good but e get some small wahala. Try to dey clear and avoid incomplete sentences. Also, make your answer dey natural and no too long. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect your ideas well.

例: Yes, I like singing because it helps me forget my worries and relax. Also, I enjoy singing different types of songs, which makes it more fun.

提案: Your answer dey okay but e get some incomplete ending and small grammar issues. Try to finish your sentences well and use linking words like 'therefore' or 'because' to make your points clear and connected.

例: Yes, I have learnt how to sing. When I was younger, I joined the church choir and practiced every day. This helped me improve my singing skills and understand my pitch better.

提案: Your answer is meaningful but start directly to answer the question. Avoid unrelated words like 'Good' at the beginning. Use linking words like 'because' to explain your feelings clearly.

例: I want to sing for the Almighty because it gives me a sense of relief and freedom. Singing in a spiritual atmosphere helps me feel peaceful and connected.

提案: Your answer is good but try to make it more concise and use linking words like 'because' and 'so' to connect your ideas smoothly. Also, avoid repeating similar ideas multiple times.

例: Yes, I think singing brings happiness because whenever I sing, I feel relieved and peaceful. It helps me escape the chaos of the world and feel calm.

× I love singing 'cause it makes me forget about all my sorrows presently, it helps me stay relaxed and I love the variety of songs I have to sing. It gives me. Like.

✓ I love singing because it makes me forget all my sorrows at present, helps me stay relaxed, and I love the variety of songs I get to sing. It gives me joy.

The original sentence has sentence fragments and improper conjunction use, making it unclear and grammatically incorrect. The phrase 'It gives me. Like.' is incomplete and unclear. The correction combines ideas properly and completes the thought, improving clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Yes, I guess so because while I was younger I joined the church and being a chorus star, we always have choir practice every day.

✓ Yes, I guess so because when I was younger, I joined the church choir and, being a chorus star, we always had choir practice every day.

The original sentence mixes past and present tense incorrectly ('we always have'). Since the action happened in the past, 'have' should be changed to 'had' to maintain past tense consistency.

× So that really helped me to learn better ways to sing.

✓ That really helped me learn better ways to sing.

The phrase 'helped me to learn' is grammatically acceptable but can be more concise as 'helped me learn'. Removing 'to' improves sentence flow and clarity.

× It helped me know my particular pitch while singing and I love.

✓ It helped me know my particular pitch while singing, and I love it.

The original sentence ends abruptly with 'and I love.' which is incomplete. Adding 'it' completes the thought and corrects the sentence structure.

× Good. I love how singing for the Almighty gives me this sense of relief and freedom from this world.

✓ I love how singing for the Almighty gives me a sense of relief and freedom from this world.

The word 'Good.' is unnecessary and does not fit the sentence context. Removing it improves sentence coherence.

× It helps me to be in that spiritual atmosphere that I love to encounter.

✓ It helps me be in that spiritual atmosphere that I love to experience.

The verb 'encounter' is not typically used with 'atmosphere' in this context. 'Experience' is a better choice to express the intended meaning.

× Yes, I feel singing brings a lot of happiness to people because I have encountered it.

✓ Yes, I feel singing brings a lot of happiness to people because I have experienced it.

The verb 'encountered' is not appropriate here; 'experienced' better conveys the personal feeling of happiness from singing.

× Each time I sing, I feel happy, I feel relieved. I feel away from the whole chaos and harshness of the atmosphere or the world really gives me this peaceful, calm nature.

✓ Each time I sing, I feel happy and relieved. Being away from the chaos and harshness of the world really gives me a peaceful, calm feeling.

The original sentence is fragmented and confusing. Combining related ideas and correcting sentence structure improves clarity and grammatical correctness.