Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 답변이 자연스럽고 효과적이지만, 문법적 오류(예: 'improve' 대신 'improves')를 수정하고, 문장 길이를 5문장 이내로 유지하는 것이 좋습니다. 또한, 연결어 사용을 조금 더 명확히 하여 문장 간 논리적 흐름을 강화하세요.

例: Yes, I really enjoy singing because it helps me forget my worries and relieve stress. For example, when I sing my favorite songs, I feel more relaxed and happy, which improves my overall mood. Moreover, singing allows me to express my emotions and feel more connected to others.

提案: 'Beside'는 'Besides'로 수정해야 하며, 문장 구조를 좀 더 자연스럽게 다듬는 것이 필요합니다. 또한, 'shy and nervous' 앞에 'I am'을 추가하여 문법적 완성도를 높이세요.

例: No, I have never taken singing lessons, but I find singing quite difficult because it requires a lot of practice and vocal control. Besides, I usually feel shy and nervous when I try to sing in front of other people, so I prefer to keep it private.

提案: 문법 오류('has create' → 'has created', 'bring your' → 'brings joy')를 수정하고, 문장을 명확하게 마무리하세요. 또한, 문장 간 연결어 사용을 강화하여 답변의 논리성을 높이세요.

例: I would like to sing for my family and close friends because singing for them feels very special. They have already supported and appreciated my efforts, which motivates me to perform better. Additionally, sharing music with my loved ones has created a warm atmosphere that brings joy.

提案: 답변이 자연스럽고 구체적이며 연결어도 적절히 사용되었습니다. 다만, 'energetic and satisfied' 대신 더 자연스러운 표현을 사용하면 좋겠습니다. 예를 들어, 'more energetic and content'로 바꾸는 것을 추천합니다.

例: Yes, I think singing brings happiness to people because it helps them feel more energetic and content. For example, singing can reduce stress and improve mood, which makes people feel happier. Additionally, singing with others can create a sense of connection and joy.

× which improve my overall mood

✓ which improves my overall mood

The subject 'which' refers to 'singing' (singular), so the verb should be in the third person singular form 'improves' to agree with the subject.

× Beside, I usually shy and nervous when I try to sing in front of other people, so I prefer to keep it private.

✓ Besides, I am usually shy and nervous when I try to sing in front of other people, so I prefer to keep it private.

The correct adverb is 'Besides' to add information, not 'Beside'. Also, the sentence lacks the verb 'am' to link the subject 'I' with the adjectives 'shy and nervous'.

× I usually shy and nervous when I try to sing in front of other people

✓ I am usually shy and nervous when I try to sing in front of other people

The sentence is missing the verb 'am' to correctly form the present tense linking verb structure 'I am shy and nervous'.

× Additionally, sharing music with my loved ones has create a warm atmosphere that bring your.

✓ Additionally, sharing music with my loved ones has created a warm atmosphere that brings joy.

The verb 'has' requires the past participle 'created' to form the present perfect tense. Also, 'bring your' is incorrect; it should be 'brings joy' to correctly complete the sentence.