Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear but has some redundancy and minor grammatical errors. Try to avoid repeating words and use linking words to make your answer more coherent. Also, keep your answer within 5 sentences for better effectiveness.

例: I don't enjoy singing because I feel my voice isn't very good. Instead, I prefer listening to various genres of music, which I find more relaxing and enjoyable.

提案: Your answer is understandable but contains some informal phrases and redundancy. Avoid using fillers like 'but yeah' and try to use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

例: No, I have never taken professional singing lessons. However, I enjoy singing casually during my free time, although I prefer listening to music more.

提案: Your answer has many fillers and hesitations which affect fluency. Try to speak more confidently and avoid unnecessary pauses. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas and provide a clear topic sentence.

例: I usually sing for myself, especially when I'm feeling down. Singing helps me to relax and improve my mood.

提案: Your answer shows good personal experience but has some grammatical errors and informal expressions. Avoid fillers like 'you know' and use precise vocabulary. Also, try to make your sentences more concise and coherent with linking words.

例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness. From my experience, when I feel upset, listening to or singing music helps improve my mood and brings me joy.

× I don't like singing, I rather prefer to listen to music.

✓ I don't like singing; I rather prefer to listen to music.

The original sentence incorrectly uses a comma to join two independent clauses, which is a comma splice. Using a semicolon correctly separates the two related independent clauses, improving sentence structure.

× But yeah, again, I rather prefer to listen to music and vibe with it.

✓ But yeah, again, I rather prefer to listen to music and vibe with it.

No correction needed here as the sentence is grammatically acceptable. 'But yeah' is an informal conjunction used appropriately.

× I naturally sing for myself when I am not in in a very nice mood.

✓ I naturally sing for myself when I am not in a very nice mood.

The sentence contains a repeated preposition 'in in'. Removing the duplicate 'in' corrects the prepositional phrase.

× Whenever I'm in a very bad mood or in a very bad space, I try to listen to a very good music or I try to jam with the music to lighten up my mood and bring out the joy in me.

✓ Whenever I'm in a very bad mood or in a very bad space, I try to listen to very good music or I try to jam with the music to lighten up my mood and bring out the joy in me.

The word 'music' is an uncountable noun and should not be preceded by the article 'a'. Removing 'a' before 'very good music' corrects the usage.