Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more natural and clear by avoiding redundancy and improving sentence structure. For example, instead of saying 'I think I have a little talent in singing', you can say 'I believe I have some talent in singing'. Also, avoid vague phrases like 'makes advantages in my physical as well as the mental well-being' and replace them with clearer expressions such as 'improves my physical and mental well-being'.

例: Yes, I like singing very much because I believe I have some talent in it. Singing boosts my confidence and improves both my physical and mental well-being.

提案: Your answer can be more coherent and natural by using linking words and avoiding repetition. For example, instead of repeating 'learned' and 'learn', you can say 'I have never taken formal singing lessons, but I taught myself by watching short videos on TikTok. I practice singing by following the videos step by step.'

例: No, I have never taken formal singing lessons, but I taught myself by watching short videos on TikTok. I practice singing by following the videos step by step.

提案: Your answer is unclear and lacks specific details. Try to respond directly and clearly. For example, you can say 'I want to sing for people around the world to spread peace and happiness.' This makes your intention clearer and more natural.

例: I want to sing for people around the world to spread peace and happiness.

提案: Your answer has good ideas but is not very clear or well-structured. Try to organize your thoughts with linking words and clearer expressions. For example, you can say 'Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people because music can be enjoyed regardless of one's mood. Even when someone feels bad, music can uplift their spirit and bring joy to their soul.'

例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people because music can be enjoyed regardless of one's mood. Even when someone feels bad, music can uplift their spirit and bring joy to their soul.

× I think I have a little talent in singing.

✓ I think I have a little talent for singing.

The correct preposition to use with 'talent' is 'for' rather than 'in'. So, 'talent for singing' is the proper phrase in English (Malaysia).

× It can give me the confidence which makes advantages in my physical as well as the mental well-being, Yeah.

✓ It can give me the confidence which brings advantages to my physical as well as my mental well-being.

The pronoun 'which' refers to 'confidence' and should be followed by a verb that fits the context. 'Makes advantages' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'brings advantages to'. Also, 'my' should be added before 'mental well-being' for clarity in English (Malaysia).

× No, I never learned how to sing, but I learned it by myself.

✓ No, I have never learned how to sing, but I learned it by myself.

When talking about life experiences up to now, the present perfect tense 'have never learned' is preferred in English (Malaysia). However, 'learned it by myself' is correct as a past action.

× I learn with the video sentence by sentence to learn how to sing.

✓ I learn from the video sentence by sentence to learn how to sing.

The correct preposition to use with 'learn' in this context is 'from' rather than 'with' in English (Malaysia).

× I want to sing for a feeling of the world, to make a peace world here.

✓ I want to sing for the feeling of the world, to make a peaceful world here.

The phrase 'a feeling of the world' should use the definite article 'the' to specify the feeling. Also, 'peace world' is incorrect; the adjective form 'peaceful' should be used before 'world' in English (Malaysia).

× to make a peace world here.

✓ to make a peaceful world here.

'Peace' is a noun; to describe 'world', the adjective 'peaceful' should be used in English (Malaysia).

× because what counts more is not whether you think good or bad, even you seem very badly, you can still feel the music.

✓ because what counts more is not whether you think good or bad, even if you seem very bad, you can still feel the music.

The phrase 'even you seem very badly' is incorrect. 'Badly' is an adverb, but here an adjective 'bad' is needed to describe 'you'. Also, 'even if' is the correct conjunction to introduce the condition in English (Malaysia).

× Enjoy the music and feel the happiness in the souls.

✓ Enjoy the music and feel the happiness in your soul.

The phrase 'in the souls' is incorrect; it should be 'in your soul' to refer personally and correctly in English (Malaysia).