Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer shows enthusiasm but lacks clarity and natural phrasing. Try to use more precise expressions and avoid redundancy. For example, instead of 'it makes me really and bring me joy', say 'it really brings me joy and helps me relax.' Also, keep your answer concise and coherent.

例: Yes, I enjoy singing because I love music. Singing helps me relax and brings me a lot of joy.

提案: Your answer provides cultural context, which is good, but the sentence structure is confusing and some grammar is incorrect. Use linking words to connect ideas clearly and correct grammar, for example, 'In my country, karaoke is popular, and people often sing together from a young age to socialise.'

例: No, I haven't learned how to sing formally. However, karaoke is very popular in Japan, and people often sing together from a young age to socialise and have fun.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to express your idea more clearly and use correct grammar. For example, 'I prefer to sing for myself because I'm a bit shy about how my voice sounds to others, even my friends.'

例: I usually sing for myself because I'm a bit shy about how my voice sounds to other people, even my friends.

提案: Your answer has a good idea but is not expressed clearly. Use linking words and correct grammar to make your point more natural. For example, 'I believe singing can bring happiness because it helps people forget their worries. At least, that's how it works for me.'

例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness because it helps people forget their worries. At least, that's how it works for me.

× Then by singing I can refresh and it makes me really and bring me joy.

✓ Then by singing I can refresh myself and it really makes me happy and brings me joy.

The original sentence incorrectly uses 'refresh' without an object and has awkward phrasing. 'Refresh' is a transitive verb here and needs an object like 'myself'. Also, 'makes me really' is incomplete and unclear; it should be 'makes me really happy'. Additionally, 'bring me joy' should be 'brings me joy' to agree with the singular subject 'it'. The corrected sentence uses the gerund 'singing' properly and clarifies the meaning.

× No, I've never learned how to sing but in my country we have a karaoke and since we are young every Japanese people tend to go to the karaoke and sing and having the communication with others.

✓ No, I've never learned how to sing but in my country we have karaoke and since we were young, Japanese people tend to go to karaoke to sing and communicate with others.

The sentence has tense inconsistency and awkward phrasing. 'Since we are young' should be 'since we were young' to match past context. 'Every Japanese people' is incorrect; 'people' is plural and 'every' is singular, so 'Japanese people' without 'every' is correct. 'Having the communication' is incorrect; it should be 'communicate' as a verb. Also, 'a karaoke' is incorrect because 'karaoke' is uncountable here, so 'karaoke' without 'a' is correct.

× For myself, because I'm a little bit shy by by heard my voice from somebody else, even from my friend.

✓ For myself, because I'm a little bit shy about hearing my voice from somebody else, even from my friend.

The phrase 'shy by by heard' is incorrect. The correct preposition is 'shy about' followed by a gerund 'hearing'. Also, 'heard' should be 'hearing' to indicate the action causing shyness. The repetition 'by by' is a typo and removed.

× Maybe only my case, but yes, singing brings us the happiness.

✓ Maybe it's only my case, but yes, singing brings us happiness.

The phrase 'the happiness' is incorrect because 'happiness' is an uncountable noun and does not need the definite article 'the' here. Also, 'Maybe only my case' is awkward; adding 'it's' clarifies the meaning. The corrected sentence is more natural and grammatically correct.