Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more structured by starting with a clear topic sentence, then adding specific reasons or examples. Also, avoid filler phrases like 'I would say' to make your answer more natural and concise.

例: Yes, I like singing because it allows me to express my emotions creatively. For example, when I sing, I feel more relaxed and happy, which makes it a fun hobby for me.

提案: Your answer is good but could be improved by linking your ideas more clearly and adding a bit more detail. Use linking words like 'so' or 'therefore' to connect your thoughts smoothly.

例: I haven't learnt singing professionally, so I only sing for fun. I enjoy it because there is no pressure to be perfect, and therefore, I can simply enjoy myself.

提案: Try to start with a clear topic sentence and then explain your idea with specific reasons. Use linking words like 'because' to connect your thoughts and avoid repeating words unnecessarily.

例: I would like to sing for my fiancé or husband because singing can be a romantic way to express my feelings and enjoy special moments together.

提案: Your answer is clear and relevant, but you can improve coherence by using more varied linking words and avoiding repetition. Also, try to add more specific examples or reasons.

例: Definitely, singing can bring happiness to people because it helps them relax and have fun. For instance, many people go to karaoke bars to relieve stress and enjoy time with friends.

× I enjoy singing, I feel like it's a way of expressing myself and it is a fun hobby I would say.

✓ I enjoy singing because I feel like it's a way of expressing myself, and it is a fun hobby, I would say.

The original sentence is a run-on sentence with improper punctuation and conjunction use. To improve clarity and grammatical correctness, it should be split or connected properly using conjunctions and commas.

× Have you ever learnt how to sing?

✓ Have you ever learned how to sing?

'Learnt' is a British English past tense form, while 'learned' is the American English form. Depending on the variety of English, 'learned' is more commonly used in American English. Since the rest of the transcript uses American English conventions, 'learned' is preferred.

× I don't feel like there is a lot of pressure to be perfect.

✓ I don't feel that there is a lot of pressure to be perfect.

The phrase 'feel like' is often used to express an opinion or impression, but in this context, 'feel that' is more appropriate to introduce a clause expressing a fact or belief.

× It is just for me to enjoy myself.

✓ It is just for me to enjoy it myself.

The pronoun 'it' is missing to refer back to the activity of singing. Adding 'it' clarifies what 'myself' is enjoying.

× Probably a fiance or husband.

✓ Probably a fiancé or husband.

The word 'fiancé' requires an accent on the 'e' to be spelled correctly in English. Also, the sentence fragment lacks a verb and should be connected properly, but since the instruction is to correct only grammar mistakes from the list, the accent correction is applied.

× I feel like singing could be a romantic thing that could express how I feel to my husband and just have a good time with him.

✓ I feel like singing could be a romantic thing that could express how I feel for my husband and just have a good time with him.

The preposition 'to' is incorrect when expressing feelings towards someone; 'for' is the correct preposition to use in this context.