Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is understandable but has some repetition and minor grammar mistakes. Try to avoid repeating words like 'the' and 'I'. Also, keep your answer concise and clear by focusing on one or two main reasons. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: Yes, I love eating chocolate because it tastes delicious and has a pleasant aroma. After a long day, eating a piece of chocolate makes me feel happy and relaxed.

提案: Your answer is a bit repetitive and unclear. Try to organize your ideas logically and avoid filler words like 'uh'. Use linking words to connect your examples and be specific about the types of chocolate you enjoy.

例: I eat chocolate every day because I really enjoy it. For example, I like chocolate ice cream, chocolate cake, and plain chocolate bars.

提案: Your answer is clear but has some grammar errors and repetitions. Avoid repeating words and use correct verb forms. Also, try to explain your reason more smoothly using linking words.

例: When I was a kid, I didn't eat chocolate often because my mother didn't allow me to. She thought it would harm my teeth.

提案: Your answer has some grammar mistakes and incomplete sentences. Try to use linking words to connect your ideas and complete your thoughts. Also, be more specific about why chocolate is popular.

例: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because of its delicious flavor. Moreover, it can be used in many desserts like ice cream and cakes, which makes it versatile.

提案: Your answer is good but has minor grammar mistakes. Avoid saying 'the real 1' and instead explain why you prefer dark chocolate. Use linking words to express your opinion clearly.

例: I like all flavors of chocolate, but my favorite is dark chocolate because it tastes rich and helps me feel calm and comfortable.

提案: Your answer has grammar errors and awkward phrasing. Try to use correct sentence structures and linking words. Be specific about why chocolate is a good gift.

例: Yes, chocolate is a great gift because on Valentine's Day, couples often give chocolates and flowers to express their love and emotions.

× Yes, I love eating chocolate because it's really tasty and the the smell is good and after a long day I I eat an egg, a piece of chocolate and it made me happy.

✓ Yes, I love eating chocolate because it's really tasty and the smell is good and after a long day I eat an egg, a piece of chocolate and it makes me happy.

The definite article 'the' was repeated twice ('the the smell'). Also, 'it made me happy' should be 'it makes me happy' to maintain present tense consistency. Repetition of 'I' was also corrected. The definite article 'the' is used correctly before 'smell' as it refers to a specific smell (chocolate's smell).

× Yes, I love eating chocolate because it's really tasty and the the smell is good and after a long day I I eat an egg, a piece of chocolate and it made me happy.

✓ Yes, I love eating chocolate because it's really tasty and the smell is good and after a long day I eat an egg, a piece of chocolate and it makes me happy.

The phrase 'it made me happy' is in past tense, but the context is about a habitual action, so present tense 'it makes me happy' is appropriate. Also, repeated 'I' was removed for clarity.

× So I might differentiate all chocolate different, uh, kind of chocolate.

✓ So I might differentiate all kinds of chocolate.

The phrase 'different kind of chocolate' was incorrectly used as 'different, uh, kind of chocolate'. The correct expression is 'all kinds of chocolate' to indicate variety. Also, 'different' is an adjective and should not be used as an adverb here.

× For example, like uh, ice cream, I eat chocolate ice cream cake, chocolate cake and uh, I eat uh, chocolate.

✓ For example, I eat chocolate ice cream, chocolate cake, and chocolate.

The phrase 'chocolate ice cream cake' is confusing; it should be 'chocolate ice cream' and 'chocolate cake' as separate items. Also, unnecessary fillers like 'uh' were removed for clarity.

× When I was a kid, no, I didn't eat chocolate very often because my, my mother wouldn't let me to eat chocolate because she think it cost, uh, our teeth bad.

✓ When I was a kid, no, I didn't eat chocolate very often because my mother wouldn't let me eat chocolate because she thought it would harm our teeth.

The modal verb 'wouldn't let me to eat' is incorrect; 'let' is followed by the base verb without 'to'. Also, 'she think' should be 'she thought' to match past tense. 'Cost our teeth bad' is incorrect; 'harm our teeth' is the correct expression.

× When I was a kid, no, I didn't eat chocolate very often because my, my mother wouldn't let me to eat chocolate because she think it cost, uh, our teeth bad.

✓ When I was a kid, no, I didn't eat chocolate very often because my mother wouldn't let me eat chocolate because she thought it would harm our teeth.

The verb 'think' should be in past tense 'thought' to match the past context. Also, 'cost our teeth bad' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'harm our teeth' or 'damage our teeth'.

× I think it because of it flavor, it is very tasty.

✓ I think it is because of its flavor; it is very tasty.

The pronoun 'it' is missing the verb 'is' after it. Also, 'it flavor' should be 'its flavor' to show possession.

× And I think, uh, every different shape and every different situation, you can add chocolate like in every dessert, ice cream cake, something like that.

✓ And I think, in every different shape and situation, you can add chocolate, like in every dessert, ice cream, cake, something like that.

The phrase 'every different shape and every different situation' is better expressed with 'in every different shape and situation'. Also, 'ice cream cake' should be separated as 'ice cream, cake' for clarity.

× Yeah I love every different flavor of chocolate but my favorite is dark chocolate.

✓ Yeah, I love every different flavor of chocolate, but my favorite is dark chocolate.

Added commas for clarity and natural pause. No major pronoun error but punctuation improves readability.

× It is the real 1 and I think it make me more comfortable and more calm.

✓ It is the real one and I think it makes me more comfortable and calmer.

'Make' should be 'makes' to agree with third person singular subject 'it'. Also, 'more calm' is better expressed as 'calmer' for comparative adjective.

× Yes, it is the best gift because in Valentine's Day are like couples used to give to chocolate and flower to each other to a spread their emotion, their love.

✓ Yes, it is the best gift because on Valentine's Day, couples usually give chocolate and flowers to each other to spread their emotions and love.

The preposition 'in' should be 'on' for days. 'Are like couples used to give to chocolate and flower' is incorrect; corrected to 'couples usually give chocolate and flowers'. 'To a spread' should be 'to spread'. Also, 'flower' should be plural 'flowers'.

× So this is the best gift to to give others.

✓ So this is the best gift to give to others.

Removed repeated 'to'. Added 'to' before 'others' for correct expression.