Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答时语言不够自然，句子结构混乱，表达不够清晰。建议简化句子，直接表达喜欢巧克力的原因，并用连词连接观点。

例: Yes, I like eating chocolate because I enjoy its sweet taste. I especially like milk and dark chocolate, as both flavors are very popular.

提案: 回答中语法错误较多，表达不连贯。建议用完整句子说明频率，并解释原因，使用连词使句子更流畅。

例: I eat chocolate about twice a week because it helps me when I feel hungry and prevents low blood sugar.

提案: 表达不够准确，时态和语法错误较多。建议用过去时描述童年习惯，句子简洁且逻辑清晰。

例: Yes, I often ate chocolate when I was a child because I loved sweet snacks. However, my parents tried to stop me from eating too much.

提案: 句子结构复杂且不自然，表达不够清晰。建议用简单句说明巧克力受欢迎的原因，并使用连词连接观点。

例: Chocolate is popular worldwide because it has a delicious flavor. When you eat it, it melts quickly and tastes very good, which makes people enjoy it.

提案: 表达中有语法和拼写错误，句子不够流畅。建议简化表达，清楚描述喜欢的口味及原因。

例: My favorite flavor is classic milk chocolate because it reminds me of my childhood when my grandma gave me milk chocolate bars.

提案: 回答较为自然，但有语法错误和表达不够准确。建议注意冠词和介词的使用，句子更连贯。

例: Yes, definitely. Many people give chocolate as a gift on Valentine's Day, but it can also be given on birthdays or Christmas. However, in China, giving chocolate as a gift is not very common.

× Yes, already fascinating in the chocolate, this kind of food, maybe it's kind of snack, it's really enjoy that have the sweet taste when I put it in my mouth and I also like the milk flavor or the dark chocolate flavor.

✓ Yes, I am already fascinated by chocolate. This kind of food is maybe a kind of snack. I really enjoy the sweet taste when I put it in my mouth, and I also like the milk flavor or the dark chocolate flavor.

原句中“already fascinating in the chocolate”用法错误，应该用被动形式“am fascinated by chocolate”表示“我对巧克力感兴趣”。此外，“it's really enjoy that have the sweet taste”结构混乱，应改为“I really enjoy the sweet taste”。建议使用正确的动词形式和介词搭配。

× This kind of food, maybe it's kind of snack, it's really enjoy that have the sweet taste when I put it in my mouth and I also like the milk flavor or the dark chocolate flavor.

✓ This kind of food is maybe a kind of snack. I really enjoy the sweet taste when I put it in my mouth, and I also like the milk flavor or the dark chocolate flavor.

“kind of snack”前缺少冠词“a”，因为“snack”是可数名词单数形式，需用冠词修饰。

× Maybe 2 * a week. I always will buy a box of chocolate for sometimes I'm made hungry.

✓ Maybe twice a week. I always buy a box of chocolate because sometimes I get hungry.

“I always will buy”时态和语气不自然，通常用一般现在时表示习惯动作，故改为“I always buy”。“for sometimes I'm made hungry”表达不正确，应改为“because sometimes I get hungry”。

× Yeah, chocolate is a kind of sweet snacks that the children were very fascinated on it.

✓ Yeah, chocolate is a kind of sweet snack that children were very fascinated with.

“fascinated on”用法错误，正确搭配是“fascinated with”。此外，“sweet snacks”应为单数“sweet snack”，因为前面有“a kind of”。

× So as a child, I'm really enjoying this kind of snack and I also eat a lot. My parents will avoid me to do it.

✓ So as a child, I really enjoyed this kind of snack and I also ate a lot. My parents tried to stop me from doing it.

描述过去的事情应使用过去时，“I'm really enjoying”应改为“I really enjoyed”，“I also eat”改为“I also ate”。“My parents will avoid me to do it”表达错误，应改为“My parents tried to stop me from doing it”。

× It might well be the good flavor of this chocolate because when you put it in the mouth you can soon felt it's melting and then a good flavor in your mouth that's make you enjoyable.

✓ It might well be the good flavor of this chocolate because when you put it in your mouth you can soon feel it melting and then a good flavor in your mouth that makes you enjoy it.

“felt”应为原形“feel”与情态动词“can”连用；“it's melting”应为“it melting”作动名词；“that's make you enjoyable”主谓不一致，应改为“that makes you enjoy it”。

× My favorite flavor is must be the classic milk flavor.

✓ My favorite flavor must be the classic milk flavor.

“is must be”重复，应该去掉“is”，直接用“must be”。

× It is really make me feel remem remember back to my child that my grandma has give me a chocolate barred milk flavor that is really great.

✓ It really makes me remember back to my childhood that my grandma gave me a chocolate bar with milk flavor that was really great.

“is really make”时态错误，应为“really makes”；“remem remember”重复，应为“remember”；“my child”应为“my childhood”；“has give”应为过去式“gave”；“barred”应为“bar”。

× Many people will send the chocolate in the Valentine's Day, but you also can send it as a present in a birthday or the other Christmas Day.

✓ Many people send chocolate on Valentine's Day, but you can also send it as a present on a birthday or Christmas.

“will send”不合适，习惯性动作用一般现在时“send”；“in the Valentine's Day”应为“on Valentine's Day”；“the other Christmas Day”表达不自然，改为“Christmas”。

× But in China, I think sending the chocolate is not normal.

✓ But in China, I think sending chocolate is not common.

“sending the chocolate”中“the”不必要，且“not normal”表达不自然，改为“not common”更合适。